Category Archives: love

Brother Time

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Before Nathan went away to West Point, a family friend gave our son an incredible graduation gift. 


Ron, who is a husband and father of two, sent our son a framed copy of a quote by Abraham Lincoln, which by itself was a pretty awesome gift for a guy who loves history. But it was what Ron included in a card that deeply touched my heart. My husband’s high school buddy gave our son $100 cash.  

What 18 year old kid do you know who doesn’t like cold, hard cash? Sah-sweet!
However, this bounty, wasn’t for Nate to spend on himself, according to Ron’s note, the money had one intention. Our son was required to spend that money creating a special time with his brothers. Ron also specified that this was BROTHER TIME, not mom time or dad time. I jokingly offered to hang out with them and Nathan quickly rebuffed that idea. You should have seen the excitement Aaron and Isaac had imagining doing some cool stuff with their oldest bro.

My son received many wonderful and generous gifts from family and friends. I do not want to minimize the kindness and love people poured into them, they are worthy of many blog posts separately. It’s just that I had never heard of anyone, in particular, a guy, thinking about investing in brotherly memories. 

The guys went a movie, Indiana Jones (which wasn’t that great, btw) and out for lunch. Oh, how I would have loved being in a nearby table and watching my three ka–nuckle heads yukking it up. With the $100 my three sons went fishing and bowling. The guys went to Chick-Fil-A and grabbed some ice cream. As the day crept by when we were going to have to say goodbye to Nate, these moments became lasting treasures.

 

Forever, I shall remember Ron’s generosity and creativity. I was as blessed as my boys and I didn’t even have a handful of popcorn or a lick of that ice cream. I think it’s every mother’s dream to raise children who sincerely love each other and so far, that is proving true. 

I’ve included a video of their bowling “match” and a few pics of the guys who were together days before Nate reported to the United States Military Academy and when they hung out as brothers on A-Day. 


If you are ever in need of a special high school graduation gift, consider this one, folks!

Scooter @ West Point

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There wasn’t a happier mama with a broken foot on a scooter in New York on Saturday, August 23rd. That’s the day I got to see my boy who graduated from lowly new cadet status to plebe at the United States Military Academy.  I, along with my DH, mom and two younger OS saw Nate along with over 1200 of his fellow new cadets join the rest of the cadre in a memorable ceremony. It was a sight to behold. I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. 

Saturday morning, my Soldier marched by me and it nearly took my breath away to see him in his uniform and white hat. My chiseled chin, steely eyed son marched by me and I was so pleased to recognize him in the sea of white and gray. “There he is! There he is!” I cried to my family. Like a badge of honor, I was thrilled that I, Nate’s mom, saw him first. Thanks to my 
handicap, we didn’t sit in the bleachers and caught a closer look at him as he walked on by. Also, thanks to my handicap, we got a sweet parking spot so I had that going for me. HA! 

June 30th is the day that I will always remember as one of the toughest days of my life. Saying goodbye was so intense. But August 23rd was one of the proudest because my son accomplished something most people will never understand. Surviving Cadet Basic Training aka Beast is very significant, I wouldn’t have lasted ten minutes. But my boy did it, praise the Lord!

When I saw my Soldier walking toward us after the ceremony, I wish I had had wings instead of a scooter because I couldn’t get there fast enough. I was peddling on my good foot as fast as I could. Good thing no one was in the way because I would have run them over. After six and a half weeks, having my son’s arms around me, hugging him tightly, kissing those cheeks, I was proud and overjoyed. At long last, I could see him, touch him, spend time with my beloved child. 


We took him back to the hotel where Nate put on some civies (regular people clothes) and then fell asleep. There is a lot of stress as a plebe and I think he needed some downtime, a chance to decompress. When you are a plebe, feeling like a human being is a luxury. 


There is so much more to share and I’m savoring the memories hundreds of miles away. Stay tuned. 

How to Tell if Your Husband Loves You

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This post is for you married ladies. Between us girls, sometimes we wonder if our husbands really care. Can we tawlk? Let me give you a fairly easy litmus test. Trust me, ladies, I’ve done this and now I know. You deserve to know how he really feels! 

Directions: 


1. Break your foot. Right or left, it doesn’t matter. Break it good so that you will need a cast. 
2. Decide that you want your cast to be special, that you want to make a “statement.”
3. Think of a snappy motto that you want to display. I have provided a helpful and patriotic example. 

4. Ask your husband/suitor to draw or write this motto on the cast. If he says, “ok,” then he has shown you a certain degree of affection.
5. Do not stop there, girls!

6. Decide that your cast is not special enough. Go to a nearby craft store and purchase Aleene’s decoupage paste.
7. Give your sweetheart a paintbrush and ask him to decorate your cast on places you yourself cannot reach. If he says, “ok,” then he has shown you that he is a keeper, however…
8. Do not stop there, girls!
9. Look at your toenails. You’ll notice that your toenails on said broken foot are blah. 
10. Get a bottle of nail polish and with your cutest facial expression, ask your DH if he’ll paint your nails.
11. Give him time. By this point, you might notice a slight discomfort in your man. Push past this girls. Allow him a moment. Continue to make the most pitiful face imaginable. Note: you may need to do this up to a full minute but do not give up! If your guy takes the nail polish bottle, albeit reluctantly, congratulations! You know your husband loves you madly!

I have tried other techniques but after nearly 21 years of marriage, I can say that this method is fool-proof! Let me know how it goes or any other suggestions you have. I’m always here to help.

Signed,

Scooter
 

I can’t wait!

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The first concert I ever went to was to see Elton John. I wore a multi-colored striped t-shirt that I had made just to look extra hot and brought my camera with fresh flash bulbs because I had to capture the moment. 

When Elton John came on-stage with his fancy glasses and strutted up to the piano, I seriously thought I was going to cry. I couldn’t believe I was at an Elton John concert and well on my way to being a full-fledged, independent woman at around 14 years old.

I also thought I was going to cry at an MC Hammer concert and not because of the guy’s funny pants. I happened to like MC Hammer at that time, thank you very much and I was a mother of two kids at the time and needed a night out with my husband. Let’s just blame that one on hormones. 

Moments, events, concerts, parades move me. I get carried away and overwhelmed. There is an energy and excitement; it’s like something big is going to take place and I’m getting to be a part of it even if it’s as a dorky teenager or a mom. I can’t help myself. 

Next week something very major is going to take place. 
I’m going to see my son. 
My Soldier. 
My boy. 

Sure, I’m going on a scooter with a broken foot and that wasn’t exactly what I anticipated but I’m going to see my son. 
My Soldier. 
My boy.


I haven’t seen my oldest OS since June 30th at West Point. Oh what an emotional day that was for me and thousands of other parents and well-wishers. I even have trouble recalling that day because of its intensity. 
Even though I was completely ambulatory at that time, I confess it was nearly impossible to walk away from the place. I left part of my heart at the United States Military Academy. 

Since June 30th, we’ve only talked with our son for a total of one hour in 6 1/2 weeks. We have received precious letters like manna from heaven but only 60 minutes total of slightly normal conversation. Not complaining but just saying, we have missed him dearly. Just the thought of seeing my child, hugging him, hearing his voice face to face beats any concert or performance I shall ever attend. Just the thought of connecting with Nathan again makes me want to weep with joy. I have ever experienced separation from any of my children for this long. 

But in a week I get to see my son. 
My Soldier. 
My boy…

Like a very wonderful and talented singer once sang (and I was there so I should know), “can’t touch this!” Hammer time next Saturday! 

Family Portrait, sort of…

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A few months ago, I was interviewed for a newspaper article. When the story came to print, I eagerly read it only to discover that the writer stated that I was the mother of two sons. My heart sank. How could he make such a mistake after I implicitly and proudly told him I had three boys??? For Pete’s sake, he and I shared a moment, he has three daughters, how could he be so dumb? It took me several weeks to write him because it bothered me so much but I eventually informed him of his error. Even though the journalist apologized, the damage was done. He didn’t know how much that hurt me. I am the mother of three sons!!! I’m screaming it from the rooftops!

Even though my oldest OS is far away, he is exactly where the Lord wants him. But that doesn’t stop me from involving my OS in family events. It’s just that now, well, I’ve just become quite inventive with incorporating my favorite soldier into gatherings. Said in my best Mr. T impersonation, “I pity the fool who makes that mistake again.”

During our family reunion, we enjoyed Sunday Service at the chapel in the mountains. We arrived promptly at 9am for the group pictures. 

When it was time for my mom’s brood to get our pictures taken, I didn’t want Nathan to be overlooked. It didn’t seem right for him to not join us. I had the solution, I grabbed the canvas USMA bag with his name on it and placed “Nathan” on the ground while the paparazzi snapped away.

Oh my, was Aaron thrilled when I asked him to “hold” his brother for the cousins photo! NOT! Thank goodness he’s such a good-natured guy who loves his mama. Sorry the picture is so small. Aaron is the tall guy on the left. He’s “holding” Nate! How sweet is that!

Officer Christian Fellowship an oasis for a new cadet at West Point

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Yesterday we received two letters from our son and as you can imagine, it soothes my heart to hear from him.

One of the few things my son is doing which do not produce anxiety in my heart is Officers’ Christian Fellowship and for that I say “amen!”

On Wednesday nights, my son and interested NCs have a first name (their very own!) and are allowed to even find a bit of a personality! What a privilege! Most other times, New Cadets are not afforded such luxury. You and I take these things for granted but you don’t if you are a lowly New Cadet.

A place of smiles and fellowship, being refreshed by the Word of God, fresh cookies and caring people. If I were a NC, I think I would live for Wednesday nights.

That’s also where you will find Barry and Barb Willey with Officers’ Christian Fellowship. Each summer in Wednesday, they join the chaplains and after worship time, the cadets get free time to relax, eat sweets and drink sodas.

Then they can get in a line and the Willey’s take a head shot of the New Cadet along with anyone else they want and then Barb sends the pictures to anyone they choose.  What a treat! This is a wonderful ministry at West Point and it’s great that Nate has plugged into the community. Today we received a picture of our son from Barb. It was the first thing I looked for in my email box this morning.

Nate is smiling!

He looks happy!

He has friends!

I am overjoyed!

Last night apparently my son sought Barb out and made sure he got a picture. He even asked for his buddies to be in the picture which makes me want to cry, (I’m tearing up right now). I am so thankful for the Willey’s. I love their servants’ hearts, they are reaching out not only to the cadets and New Cadets but to their families. I am comforted knowing my son had a mama’s arms around him even if they weren’t my own.

According to Barb’s facebook, she was up until 4am downloading photos knowing eager parents would want to receive the photos. I can relate. Although I wasn’t up until 4am, last night I received a late night email from a student needing a “word of faith.” She was hurting and needed some encouragement. I wrote her back immediately because she needed to know someone cared.

Isn’t that what we all want? To know someone cares? I sure do! In a letter from our son, Nate wrote about how Colonel Cook’s sermon on Psalm 121 was so applicable. “I will lift my eyes to the hills, from whence comes my help?” He said, “it’s pretty cool when you’re at Trophy Point and you have hills surrounding you.”

Nate will always have beautiful memories of how God’s Word was so alive during his time at West Point.

The Lord is caring and providing for our son, he feels God’s presence in this place.

Maybe not when the cadre are screaming at him but he is finding a peace that passes understanding. God always cares, always understands, is 100% dependable. 

Today I lift my eyes and hands up to the Lord and offer a word of blessing upon friendships, old and new, near and far and the body of Christ working together for His glory and kingdom.

Update: Now, five years later, my oldest olive shoot, Nate knows even more intimately how the Lord and His Word can speak to a Soldier’s spirit. During his recent journey through Ranger School, Nate found God’s Word just as relevant and life-giving. I just love what he wrote on the inside of his cap!

Click Officers’ Christian Fellowship for more info about OCF and check out this facebook page OCF at UMSA!

 

Ten reasons why it’s better to be a dorky 6th grader than a plebe

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1. You are a higher form of life. There is nothing lower than a plebe (well, almost). Note chart.

2. You can enjoy unlimited chews. No one is counting your bites. You can even swirl food around in your mouth and it’s all good.Life Form Chart.v2

3. You can sass at your superiors (although still highly dis- couraged) and not have to do push-ups. You may suffer other unpleasant consequences but not push-ups.

P10300104. You can also pass gas and not have to tell everyone or make noxious fume hand signals in the air to everyone around you.

5. You have a first name and you have heard it said in the last 24 hours.

6. You can say “Hey!” “How’s it going?” “Hello, my friend!” or even make up your own salutation. These are just a sample of myriad greetings available to you as a dorky 6th grader!

7. Your bed can be slightly messy and you can sleep under the covers.

8. You do not have to memorize your mama’s dinner menu six days in advance.

9. You enjoy unlimited time for bodily functions! Woohoo!

10. You shower alone.

Four reasons it’s better to be a plebe than a dorky 6th grader

1. Cool uniforms with your name on them.

2. Better fireworks.

3. Honor, duty, country.

4. Huah. If you need a translation, you just don’t get it.

So which one is your personal favorite? Which one would be the most challenging for you???

Phone Call

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Let me offer a big shout out to the cadre, I understand I now have a “fan base.” I’m flattered, nervous, paranoid, gee, thanks… I’m watching every word I say for fear of more push-ups coming a certain NC’s way. 

After a weekend of waiting, we finally got the call from our son. Now I find myself in a foggy, numb state after speaking to him. Time passed so quickly, just 10 minutes of conversation, 600 seconds and poof, it’s over. 


I wished he sounded more happy but I’m glad we got to talk. This is not summer camp where he gets to hang with friends and play archery so I should have expected it. The tone in his voice sounded weary and perhaps a little grouchy. I think I’d feel the same way if I were in his shoes/boots/low-quarters. 

Days of waiting and now I feel blah. When he said, “I have a minute left.” I just kept telling him, “I love you, baby!” because I wanted to make sure I told him that before he had to go. The house is emptier without him, I feel sad in my mama’s heart. 

We tape-recorded the conversation which might sound really cheesy but considering I’ve already listened to it twice, I’m glad we did. My extended family can hear our conversation and I noticed I felt better after my mom heard his voice and tried to discern how he was doing.

I’d appreciate continued prayers for my son and the challenges he has ahead of him, some that are particularly difficult for a mom to even imagine. We are getting Army Strong one way or another and can do all things through Christ who strengthens me/us. 
Picture taken from West Point chapel. Shoes are not mine, they are the Superintendent’s. 

Waiting for Nate…

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Thank goodness I’m not a smoker because if I were, I’d have blazed through a carton of cigarettes by now waiting for our son’s 10 minute call from West Point. I know my son is going through Cadet Basic Training aka Beast but my mom had a very astute observation recently. She told me, “You’re going through your own Beast.” Sure, I’m not getting screamed at, I get to chew food in unlimited bites, I’m not up at 5:30am but she was right. Parents of New Cadets go through their own Beast. Moms are so wise.


I have hesitated even to go out to the garage to grab some meat from the freezer for fear I might miss his call. We don’t live in a sprawling mansion so I have no idea how I could miss his call but I grabbed the ground pork and bolted back inside.   

I’ve cried because I haven’t heard from him. I’ve cried because I’m going to. I’ve cried because it’s going to be too short. I’ve cried for the parents whose new cadets have talked longer to their girlfriend or boyfriends than their moms and dads. Waa waa waa, ok, I’ll say it, I’m a cry baby. 

I haven’t hit the gym in two days because I can’t handle the notion of not hearing his voice. So many questions, so many stories, so little time. My husband had to pick Aaron up after mowing some lawns this afternoon. He returned, eyes wide open and stepped into the house, “no call,” was my reply. His heart was both deflated that there was still no word but relieved that he hadn’t missed hearing from his boy.  

It’s nearing dinner time and still no word. We had friends over for dinner and a played few games of Wii last night which provided a nice diversion. Tonight I’m just sewing and waiting. I’m waiting on the Lord’s timing which is always perfect and I’ll be sure to post afterward…stay tuned. 

Oh happy day – letters after R-Day

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P1040208On July 9, 2007 while just exiting a restroom in Lima, Peru, I got mugged. My pricey camera was pulled off my shoulders and back and that was probably one of the most startling events of my life.

Fast forward a year, I’m back home and this July 9 is joyous. Yeah, we have a stomach virus wreaking havoc on our family but it’s all good.

Our son wrote us!

In our mailbox, I discovered not one, not two, not three but FOUR letters from our boy!

There are not enough exclamation points to describe how I feel to read his words and glean his personality. Here are just a few and I’ll try not to be obnoxious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!P1040207

I count it a privilege that our NC (military word for New Cadet) took the precious time to write.

Some parents have yet to hear from their child and I feel for them deeply. I do not take it for granted we have these paper treasures from our soldier and will guard them close to my heart forever.

As we gathered around the family room to read his letters, I thought to myself that this is what it used to be like before email, AIM and facebook.

Writing letters is a forgotten art and in some way, I have enjoyed putting pen to paper. I’m a writer so it comes fairly naturally but my two remaining OS certainly aren’t but what sweet messages have poured from their fingers. Aaron sends funny drawings, Ike sends Scripture.

Aaron writes about the day’s happenings.

Ike shares that he has thrown up.

My DH dashed another letter out to Nathan as soon as he read Nate’s messages. They are so beautiful, I have no choice but to weep.

Without violating his privacy, I think some of you would enjoy knowing a few details but let me tell you the latest on the toe.

Although still purple, his big toe feels much better since he got it drained. Getting a toe drained doesn’t sound like fun but I’m relieved to know he’s ok. I wrote him that he had so many prayers that not only should that toe be healed in Jesus’ name but quite possibly he might have grown a third big toe as a spare!

p1040211Please keep praying not only for our family but for the other cadet families out there eagerly awaiting news from their NC.

It’s tough when no news comes your way.

In a few days, we anticipate phone calls and I can’t wait to hear his voice.  Major props to my homeslice Beth Anne who documented the first few moments when the letters arrived, love you, BA!

Getting letters from your son is better than getting mugged in South America, that’s a fact, Jack! HUAH big time!

Romans 12:15 “Rejoice with those who rejoice, mourn with those who mourn.”