A Valentine’s Day divine appointment

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I waited patiently for my friend to arrive.

But she didn’t

because I had the wrong day.

I took a selfie and sent it to my son. I had no idea that soon I would be having a very beautiful conversation!

I took a selfie and sent it to my son. I had no idea that soon I would be having a very beautiful conversation! I was being silly and carefree!

So I sat alone at the restaurant

on Valentine’s Day

wanting to reassure everyone that people do love me, they’re just not here right now…

With little battery power left on my iPhone

I pull out my little journal

The one that I’ve been drawing in

And I grab a pencil and soon some images appear on the paper.

The owner of the restaurant walks by and stops.

He asks me how I like the food.

It was delicious!

What I was working on moments before the man started speaking to me.

What I was working on moments before the man started speaking to me.

And then he asks me what I am doing.

“Are you a poet?” he inquires.

“No, these are words from the Bible” I reply.

“You study the Bible?” his Lebanese accent as flavorful as his cuisine.

I thought I was meeting my friend for lunch –

but now I’m making a friend.

“My priest tells me about Jesus. I go to church. I think what you are doing is very good thing. I have questions. I think my priest makes God sound like a monster. He says things I don’t understand.”

He seems convinced that I am a student. It’s hard for him to believe that I’m a regular person. I tell him I read the Bible every day. I study but I’m not a student. Jesus is very real in my life.

Tucked away in this restaurant, I begin to tell him some of my story. “One day I began reading the Bible for myself. I read from a Study Bible and started in the New Testament. It changed my life. I was never the same. That is a good thing.”

His face is quizzical. We both seem confused about what is happening. Neither of us expected this conversation.

I feel a little embarrassed because I’m not an artist and these aren’t my words.

photo copy 9“Whom have I in heaven but you?” he repeats Psalm 73:25 aloud.

He pauses, I slowly turn a few pages and he says kind things. He tells me it is beautiful. I’m ready to cry.

He asks me if he can get me anything and I touch his elbow and tell him he has already given me so much. I thank him, he turns away. We smile and I tell him, “Bless you.”

I think this man might just start to read the Bible. Maybe God is tugging on his tender heart. I will never know the answer but that’s how it felt within me. The mustachioed man didn’t know that hours before coming to his restaurant, I was walking and praying. “Heavenly Father, if it pleases you, open up opportunities for my life and abilities to honor you.”

God gave me a special Valentine’s Day gift today. I brought my best Friend with me today even though I appeared to be alone. And I did meet a friend after all.

Fingers be doing funky things

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I bought a journal while visiting my middle son and I finally decided to start using it. This is a cathartic experience.

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This girl’s name is Free. She has a powerful testimony.

I could clean the kitchen.

I could clean the kitchen.

My fondness of words and letters began as a pre-schooler. I taught myself to read when I traced the letters in my Dr. Seuss Dictionary.

A pen is security and voice for me. Similar in feeling to a bowl of slightly warmed French vanilla ice cream with butterscotch topping preferably with a hint of sea salt, such is the delicious comfort I experience.

Though I am a word person, I’m not a drawing person. I can’t draw. People have called me a writer but NEVER a person who can draw. You would never have me on your team in Pictionary. Seriously.

But then something really unusual started happening a few weeks ago.

I started drawing.

And not just stick figures but actual recognizable images.

Who are these characters that appear on paper?photo copy 8

What is going on with my hands and fingers?

Why am I being drawn, excuse the pun, to spend hours surrounded by ink, colored pencils and pens?

Hey!

Hey!

These images emanate deep from my soul. And from the Bible. My personal story, in part, is being played out. I don’t know where it’s going bu it has become a way to worship the Lord. I think maybe one day a grand-daughter would like these pictures.

As long as I keep my focus on who my ultimate audience is, I can draw.

If I start concerning myself on what others think, I freeze.

My audience is Jesus who is eternal and grandbabies who one day will exist, Lord willing.

Sew and blessed

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A new project, I've been sketching and writing and smudging. This is a new way for me to express thanks to the Lord.

A new project, I’ve been sketching and writing and smudging. This is a new way for me to express thanks to the Lord.

A young bride enters my home.

When she said she didn’t know anything about sewing, she wasn’t kidding.

I felt so smart.

I felt so old.

I also felt blessed.

We spent two lovely hours together. There are MANY more qualified women to teach her about sewing, I told her so. But I felt privileged to guide her youthful steps and wrinkle-free hands. It was a brave thing for her to reach out.

Don’t we all have things we all need to learn but are wary to ask? I do. What if I looked incompetent? Shouldn’t I know that (whatever it is) already? Does everybody know that (whatever it is) but me? These are the musings in my head often times.

photo copy 6She put forth some power to the foot pedal of the sewing machine and I witnessed her first stitches into fabric. Tentatively, she picked up speed and confidence. She threaded the needle, learned about feed dogs (not an animal) and imagined possibilities.

Yesterday after she left, I found time to continue the 21-Day YouVersion Bible challenge. No clue what were the verses in the day’s study, I read Scripture verses nearly custom-made for me. This is what I see.

Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works…Teach what is good – Titus 2:3

In my sanctuary, imperfect but welcoming, a beautiful young woman taught me a few things as I instructed her. Hours later, God reinforced the lesson. I needed that especially after celebrating another birthday.

This is cool, join me in this life-changing journey!

This is cool, join me in this life-changing journey!

This aging process, which I don’t always especially enjoy, grants me a chance to celebrate the things my grey, blonde, brown and pink hair have taught me. Sew and blessed all in one winter’s day. Nice.

YouVersion has a bunch of great Bible reading plans. See for yourself how God’s Word can change your life, seriously.

Five Minute Friday – afraid

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My son spends a lot of time on the train. I spend a lot of time on my knees praying for his safety.

My son spends a lot of time on the train. I spend a lot of time on my knees praying for him.

“Don’t worry, Mom, I’ve got brass knuckles.”

This was my ministry minded middle’s way of reassuring me.

He has brass knuckles, therefore,

I guess,

if he is attacked on the subway or on the streets

at night

in a high crime part of the city

while walking back from coaching an inner city boys’ basketball team

I’m not to worry.

Uh, yeah, right…

It doesn’t work that way when you’re a mom.

I grew up feeling a lot of fear, that “muscle” is well-developed.

The trust and faith muscles atrophied

I’m building them back, working them out though.

Aaron provides me with many training sessions with the Lord.

“Push past being afraid,” God reminds. “I’ve got this. I’m Jehovah Shammah (God who is there).”

Hurricane Sandy encountering MY olive shoot in Chicago. This is him in the picture!

Hurricane Sandy encountering MY olive shoot in Chicago. This is him and a buddy in the picture!

And when he went to Lake Shore Drive to experience Hurricane Sandy and sent me THIS picture of the waters nearly engulfing him…

Oh Lord, my olive shoots

With only five minutes to write, I featured just one olive shoot currently on my heart but I have a Soldier and an orange hair, freckle face OS too, sooooo,

Funky chicks write for five minutes! Come on and join us!

Funky chicks write for five minutes! Come on and join us! Click here for deets.

At least the crime rate is lower during cold weather – (another one of Aaron’s gems…)

What is a fruitful life? Learning from a snowflake hunter

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A talented friend took this picture during our recent "ice" event.

A talented friend took this picture during our recent “ice” event.

James Glaisher walked onto the platform of a hot air balloon. With a companion, the two men ascended 29,000 feet into the skies. While recording meteorological events and gathering research, they nearly froze to death before landing back on solid ground. Can you even imagine!

Ask my younger sister what my answer would be if she asked for me to join her on a subnivean adventure in the sky. She was the one I chose to test the waters of the icy creek next to our childhood home. Some days her foot plunged into the depths. Clearly, the creek wasn’t frozen over enough. Being a very perceptive big sister, I ascertained it was unsafe for me to risk life and limb. I helped her get back on dry ground, we went inside, had an argument and then watched cartoons. Other days we skated the bumpy circles on the ice. Then we went inside to warm up, had an argument and watched cartoons.

This picture makes me appreciate snowflakes a lot more than I usually do!

This picture makes me appreciate snowflakes a lot more than I usually do!

Glaisher and his buddy had higher motives than I (which isn’t exactly difficult!). Glaisher was captivated by snowflakes. He wondered about their shapes and design and contemplated great things of God. Glaisher even sketched the delicacies he found and then through the American Tract Society, wrote the aptly titled book “Snowflakes: a chapter from the Book of nature.” Each chapter of his devotional begins with a beautiful rendering of winter. You should check it out. It’s spiritually deep, really interesting. A super cool read, pun intended. And check out this website if you are a letter person. Very fascinating!

Today I find myself continuing in the YouVersion 21-Day Bible Challenge. Pondering the 22 verse in Philippians 1 in the Bible, I stop on the verse about “If I am to live by flesh, this means fruitful labor for me.”

If James Glaisher would have asked me about a travel companion, I would have recommended my sister Lorri!

If James Glaisher would have asked me about a travel companion, I would have recommended my sister Lorri!

I think about Glaisher. Then I think about me.

My prayers consist of asking the Lord that my remaining days be fruitful for Him. That might mean a clean house, ironed clothes, nutritious food and a pleasant homestead.

Some days I feel so productive, other days are sluggish and it seems like nothing gets done. Could my fruitfulness be found in journaling and Bible study? What if the Creator gave me a very specific yet unusual task such as He did with Glaisher? He drew snowflakes!

Would that be enough for me? How do I measure success? Am I as willing to plunge or ascend to icy wonders of His choosing? I don’t know, it scares me.

I want to be open to what God’s version of fruitful is for me. Father, form the remainder of my days.

Oh the memories. Bitter and sweet, truly. Much to consider on this grey winter’s day.

Blustery heart

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photoA cold morning finds
a mama worried –
about a Soldier,
a ministry-minded middle
and an orange hair, freckle face olive shoot.
Tears flow.
They’re not in trouble or doing anything wrong (or at least not that I, I mean she know/s of!).

Two hours later
she reads Scripture for a weekly Bible study
Gently, unexpectedly
God tucks comfort and assurance into her heart.

“It is good for a man to bear the yoke

while he is young.”

Lamentations, of course, this totally makes sense
This mama can be
a big time lamenter

And just like that
Worries find solace and melt away.

On this January day
She breathes.

Five Minute Friday – again

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Imagine what you could discover by participating in Five Minute Friday! Join us, it's just the best!

Imagine what you could discover by participating in Five Minute Friday! Join us, you will LOVE it!

Oh, Five Minute Friday, again you challenge me.

This word “again” is annoying. I connote unpleasant things with this word.

An olive shoot is being difficult again.

My husband has to travel again.

A family member is ill again.

They didn’t empty the dishwasher

or close the door on the dryer so now the light is out

No one puts away the clean clothes

They rustle through all the other clothes and leave things in disarray

An example of an irritating form of "again." Disheveled laundry!

An example of an irritating form of “again.” Disheveled laundry!

AGAIN

Ergh

You get the idea

Frustrating

Scary

Irritating

Repetitive

Something I don’t like is being experienced additional times. Wow.

And it’s not like I see it only in others.

I have my own “again’s” which feel even more disappointing.

But since I only have a few more minutes, let me tell you about another again which can help me not spiral into hopelessness.

A few years ago, the Hubs got me this pretty print from a West Point mom/crafty girl/blogger.

I bespy this reminder of God’s faithfulness again in my hallway. Again I stop and consider the Lord’s treasures and promises.

A pretty print made by a talented West Point mom. Here's her Etsy site.

A pretty print made by a talented West Point mom. Here’s her Etsy site.

His mercies

New every day

Every morning

Just enough

Again, I approach the throne of grace and ask for His guidance and help.

One of my favorite Scripture verses: Lamentations 3:22-24

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
    his mercies never come to an end;
 they are new every morning;
    great is your faithfulness.
‘The Lord is my portion,” says my soul,
    “therefore I will hope in him.”

Praying like Mary, thinking about Capri Sun

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I am proud of this Soldier. I must pray fervently for him.

I am proud of this Soldier. I must pray fervently for him.

After reading Monday’s daily Scripture several times, I drop to my knees to pray for my Soldier. So much is on my heart about this strong olive shoot. I notice a verse in my reading,

“Toi, Seigneur, tu connais le coeur de tous les hommes.” – Actes 1:25

Yes, Father, you know the heart of every man. I trust you listen to my heart’s cries. Incline your ear to me, your servant, My Holy One – this is what I implore.

Nate will soon be in Ranger School. I won’t be able to speak to him on the phone or receive his silly text messages for at least two months. Though I can write him letters, the frequent communication I cherish will be interrupted.

Ranger School is physically and emotionally grueling. There are aspects about the challenge that I can’t learn until he has graduated, is rested and has fattened up a little. Monday’s reading reminded me that I need to follow Mary’s example and pray with others, for our children individually and collectively, join together and seek God’s face.

I ponder what God is saying to me in this first chapter of Acts (Actes), I think about Mary and strangely enough, the new Capri Sun commercial. Admittedly, it’s a weird collage of thoughts.

Have you seen these commercials about a new vegetable-infused version of the juice drink called Super V? Here’s a link to see it yourself. .

“Paula Ebert” wants to buy a healthy juice for her son. She wants to help her son with all of his daily struggles. I chuckle to myself when I see the mom on the dodgeball court valiantly attempting to block all shots coming her boy’s way. “NO! NO! NO!” she yells to the kids trying to pellet her son. Hands flying in the air, frantically doing her best, Paula turns to her very embarrassed boy and reassures him, “Mommy’s here. It’s ok.” Bless her heart. I don’t like Capri Sun but I really like this mama. Part of every mother wishes God permitted only good things to happen to her babies. Since we live in a fallen, broken world that can’t happen but we can intercede on our children’s behalf.

21-Day-Challenge-Badge-300x300Mary prayed. 14 D’un commun accord, ils se retrouvaient souvent pour prier, avec quelques femmes, avec Marie la mère de Jésus, et avec les frères de Jésus. 

Acts (Actes) 1:14

How precious that the mom of the sinless Savior demonstrates the legacy of prayer! As I follow the 21-Day Challenge, I observe how Mary loved the Lord in this manner. In these verses, Mary didn’t pray alone but with others and in one accord for her son. To hear someone pray for my olive shoots grabs me at my very roots. Would you please pray for my son and all the men in Ranger School? If you have ever had someone pray for your child, you know what that means to a mother.

Wonder what God might say to you? Check out all of these Bible reading options, I bet there’s one that will speak to you! Give it a try and never be the same! This is the one I’m currently using, join me and many blessings!

Weird people

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This is cool, join me in this life-changing journey!

This is cool, join me in this life-changing journey!

As I begin the 21-Day Challenge on YouVersion and read the book of Mark (or Marc en francais) in the Bible, I want to occasionally articulate what God is saying to me. I will share bits of the process and encourage you to check out the different Bible reading plans. Maybe one will work for you!

Looking funny
Acting strange
Eating weird stuff

John was clothed in camel’s hair.
He ate wild honey and bugs.
He spent time in the wilderness.

I wonder if he smelled funky too. John led a supernatural, “crunchy” natural life and encountered Jesus personally. In modern days, he could have his own reality show. I would have watched it, that’s for sure.

God uses unusual people for His purposes. He also uses regular people. Sinners, tax collectors, adulterers, murderers became some of the Lord’s redeemed children.

I’m somewhere wedged between the weird and the wild. Former feminist/abortion rights activist, blasphemer, scoffer, mocker aptly describe who I was before Christ came into my heart.

Sitting on a table in France. Just one of the many dumb things I did.

Sitting on a table in France. Just one of the many dumb things I did.

Everything changed in December 1997 when I invited, pleaded with Jesus to enter my sorry soul.

Somedays I

Look funny
Act strange
Eat weird stuff

My cursing days are gone and I have told thousands my story of victory and redemption. Still a HUGE work in progress, I am a new creation because of Christ!

IMG_3493Each day we are to answer questions after reading the assigned Scripture. After reading Mark (Marc) 1:1-8, here’s are my thoughts.

God would have me start doing – Be more attentive to His opinion of me rather than others’ assessments of who I am.

God wants me to stop  – Squandering my time. I need to recognize how the Lord wants greater intimacy with me. He does not speak to me in a distant voice.

As I read the Bible in French (with my English Bible and my French dictionary close by), I notice how the Lord uses the familiar pronoun when speaking to his disciples. He “tutoies” his followers. It’s like when someone uses my favorite childhood nickname when speaking to me. I won’t tell you what this nickname is, you have to know me well enough and you probably don’t, no offense. Most people who use this nickname do not even know how much it blesses me.

Or like when my olive shoots though young men call me “Mommy” or “Mama” and not “Mom.” I feel that they REalLY like me, they know me. I let down my guard, my facade. It’s a sacred place even if we’re laughing and being silly. We have history and are connected. My heart is warm, I want to draw closer.

The Lord is tutoie-ing ME. I’m flattered, humbled, blessed.

What does God want me to continue doing? – Read the Bible in French and English. Note the subtle differences in words. Abide, rest, listen.

This is what I learned in just eight verses of God’s Word in one day. Merci bien Mon Seigneur! Je t’aime!