Gulp.
Etched into my memory is the stunningly gorgeous popular girl who looked into the mirror in the high school bathroom and let out a disgusted, “UGH! as she peered into the glass.
I was standing beside her.
If that girl was ugly, what did that mean about me? If she let out a mighty gulp, what should my response be for the creature that was looking back at me?
Pimples, fake perm, flat-chested, family problems, low on the social scale, I didn’t have a chance.
My view of myself is very negative though many people might find that hard to believe. They think that a sassy, pink-haired women would like what she sees but they are wrong.
I’m still the woman who looks in the mirror with disgust
Sometimes horror
I get in trouble with the men in my family when I inform them about my level of hideousness. They yell at me when I try to convince them that I am especially yucky. Somehow they do not see all the imperfections that make me at times even feel like I need to apologize for being out in public.
Reconciling God’s view of me with what I see, how I feel, making sense of life’s ugliness appears to be a painful, lifelong process. Ugh.
I’m not expecting you to try to convince me of my inner beauty, my physical at- tractiveness, that’s not the purpose of this post.
I wouldn’t believe you anyway.
I’m just being honest and I suspect I’m not alone. God has a lot of work to do and his view of me is what should really matter.
Ok, so that was immensely painful. “Thank you Five minute Friday“?