One day, three boys

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Posted on March 26, 2013

Last Saturday, my olive shoots were in three diametrically opposed places geographically, emotionally and spiritually.

My ministry minded middle was flying back to school following a two-week tour of the southwest with Moody Men’s Choir.
Ike, my orange hair, freckle face guy was feeling like a ginger VIP hanging with the Chicago Bulls and his Aunt Lorri in the Windy City. Truly an event worthy of its own blog post.
That’s just Ike and his new best friend, Stacey King, former Chicago Bulls player, nbd.
And then bringing up the rear, far, far behind, was my Soldier. He called us from Georgia while on his way to Wal-Mart to make a most unusual purchase. Rat poison.

Following a most enlightening conversation with our oldest OS, I proceeded to write him a letter, I mean, what else could I do? I’m sharing the contents of this letter with you should your child ever inform you s/he is on his/her way to buy rat poison. Yes, I do occasionally refer to him as Sugar Boy.

Even if you do not identify with my children’s unique life situations, you will probably understand my mama’s heart. I ask a question at the end of this post and would love to hear from you.

Ok, here’s the letter.

Dear Sugar Boy,

We just got off the phone with you and as I look upon my dirty house filled with a million projects, suddenly the most important thing I can do is write you.

Having you as a son affords me many opportunities to pray. Having you as a son gives me an interesting life. Having you as a son means I laugh more, cry frequently, feel immensely proud while simultaneously feeling remarkably small and humble.

Hearing you angry and discouraged makes me want to rescue you and beat all those jerks up! Have they not encountered a mother’s wrath? SERIOUSLY! Yet this is the life you have chosen. When others went easy, you deliberately picked the gritty and tough. You can do this. One day you will be astonished at what you did and see the manifold ways the LORD gave you the strength to persevere.

Trust me learning your son was cuddled by a rat is quite odd. I incline my ear to the Lord and ask for what purpose is this happening? And then at that moment, I trust.

Allow God to fulfill the work He has set forth in your life. There is no time of day or night when I am not loving you or thinking about you. Hold firm to your faith. Do not allow tormenters or enemies to bring you down. Pay attention to the blessings nearby…that the rat scurried by and did not bite, that you have a sense of humor, that you are able to withstand more than most.

My Soldier

Now I will go straighten up my messy house hoping to keep the rats away as well.

Be strong, my precious Soldier and son. I love you,

mama
Question: What has being a parent to your child afforded you? How has God used your children to mold and shape you as a person?

Five minute Friday – remember

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Posted on March 22, 2013

This picture hangs in my dining room. So many memories.

As I returned the phone call, a warning was necessary for my husband. “I’m going to cry.”

The voice on the other end asked the triggering question.

“How’s your grandma?” she kindly inquired.

I had only seconds to consider a polite answer. The grief which has whelmed me came surfacing back though truth told, it’s never far behind.

“We lost her 19 months ago. I’m so sorry you didn’t know. It was quick, we only knew she had brain cancer for about a week. I’m so sorry to tell you that. She loved you. You were a good friend.” I choke back the tears, I’m in the hallway of the hotel. I’m in Fort Benning visiting my Soldier on a brief pass from Ranger School. My stomach lurches within, it’s shocking how hearing from my grandma’s old friend makes me remember this woman I loved so much. I remember that I haven’t forgotten that I miss her.

After returning home, a card arrived in the mail. It was from my grandma’s friend. It was a sympathy card. Like the phone call, this card was a surprise.

I so appreciated getting this card, what a thoughtful expression and kindness.

But it was a blessed affirmation. She remembered ME. More importantly, she remembered my grandma and the friendship they shared. She remembered the sadness displayed in our phone conversation even though I reassured her she had done NOTHING wrong. I’m glad she called though it was painful. She missed her too.

Check this out and write for your sanity, that’s my personal experience!

Writing for five minutes can be a blessed experience even if you cry. Trust me, I know!

Five minute Friday – rest

6 Comments

Posted on March 15, 2013

My first and only poem to spaghetti.

Oh big pot of spaghetti, do not fret

Though your Ranger Soldier isn’t back yet

Soon you will feed him and bring his lips taste

He’s been eating MRE’s, licking the wrappers as not to waste

Your zest and your flavors, your love and your care

Will renew him on eagle’s wings, he will return to the training field and then you will dare

To go back into the cabinet, wishing you could have done more

Life is exciting with a Soldier to adore!

The day will fly by, be satisfied with your task

You nourished a man who will praise God for the delicious repast

“Please feed me!” “We will, Sugar Boy!”

So while you can, Spaghetti, get your rest

Tomorrow’s your big day, you’re truly feeding the best of the best!

Five minutes of writing, it’s wonderful for wordsmiths!

Soldier Sauce

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Posted on March 12, 2013

“Please feed me!” “We will, Sugar Boy!”

Today I announced to my orange freckle, orange hair olive shoot that he was going to help me prepare spaghetti sauce for his brother. Ike is on Spring Break and unlike some of his friends who are on safaris or at the beach, Ike is going to Fort Benning in a few days. Woot. There he will see his older brother, Nate who will be on an eight-hour pass from Ranger School. The entire day will be spent attending to Nate, nothing, but Nate.

So how did Ike respond to my request for kitchen assistance?

With a zesty YES as hearty as the sauce we would soon create?

or with a disgruntled hrmph like a jar of moldy Ragu?

If you said, “B” you would be correct. Ike did not leap into action. The idea of being my sous-chef was irritating to him at best. At one point, I told him that if he continued to complain, he wouldn’t be going anywhere. That caught his attention.

My intention isn’t to belittle my olive shoot and say he’s a slug of a son. Oh no.

This kid can throw down.

Once he got his mind around the task, Ike browned those ribs and spicy sausage. My youngest olive shoot chopped that garlic, the dude mixed that tomato sauce masterfully. The annoyance that had invaded his spirit disappeared. As he made the sauce, I worked on the meatballs. Time flew by. Instead of bitterness, we savored our time together. This whole pot of sauce is for Nate.

Our Soldier has been eating MRE (Meals Ready to Eat) during Ranger School = blech! According to Nate’s letters, he is so famished, he’s even licking the MRE wrappers!

Does this not sound like a man deserving of a soul-satisfying repast?

We have been warned that he will have lost considerable weight since we saw him last. With only eight hours of rest, we have limited time to bless and refresh our Soldier. As Ike and I turned our sights from ourselves to another more deserving, the time was flavored with grace.

May this sauce grant my Soldier strength and renewal to continue on in Ranger School!

Oh if I only had smell-a-vision. There were many life lessons gleaned from this kitchen today. Just wondering, can you relate to Ike or me? Should I post the recipe? Do you dare even invite your boys to cook in the kitchen with you?

Five minute Friday – home

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Posted on March 8, 2013

I came home to these people.

I became a full-time stay-at-home mom 15 years ago on my husband’s birthday. I wanted to mark that significant day on a day I wouldn’t forget. March 6th is now a day of double celebration for my family.

For so long the ambition of my life was to get respect and recognition.

My observation of full-time motherhood was that it was rife with disrespect and sadness. Obviously I wanted none of that. So I had my own business, attended graduate school, practiced writing M.Ed. at the end of my name.

Individually these things are not wrong. But ultimately they were not what the Lord had for me.

On March 6, 1998, I started working for a new boss. I no longer served myself. A cataclysmic shift occurred in my heart.

God wanted me home.

With only five minutes to write, you’ll have to trust me. This is what happened to me when I decided to stay home. Thanks be to God.

When I made that decision, priorities changed. My three olive shoots no longer attended day care or after school programs, they returned home to me. The significance sought outside in the world, was comfortably discovered within. Parts of me I had long denied began to blossom.

Within my home

Within my soul

There are times when I don’t always feel appreciated but I felt that way in the business world as well. This is where I belong. Home.

We rock one word for FIVE MINUTES! It’s the best! Join the fun!

Pleasure and fulfillment rest with my decision, something I will never regret.

Five Minute Friday – ordinary

8 Comments

Posted on March 1, 2013

My boy is working on getting his Ranger tab.

There is nothing ordinary about Ranger School. Some describe it as an intense 61-day combat leadership course. It has been called the “toughest combat course in the world” and “the most physically and mentally demanding leadership school the Army has to offer.” This is all true but for me it’s where a piece of my heart now dwells because my son is there.

On Wednesday night starting at about 9:00 pm, those who had made it through the first few days of grueling initial training, started a 12 mile ruck (Army slang for march) that ended at about midnight. From all accounts it is a brutal trek.

And I see the Lord’s hands upon my Soldier. When he was about eight years old, the Hubs and I were watching tv. Nate had his prayer journal nearby and was writing.

Not many eight year old boys even possess a prayer journal but my oldest olive shoot is extra-ordinary. He inquired, “How do you spell Hallelujah?”

This kid is well beyond ordinary and I praise the Lord for that!

The Hubs and I just looked at each other dumbfounded.

Who was this kid? How did he get to living in this house with us as his parents???

These moments became rather ordinary, Nate doing things in a remarkable and humble way.

Things most people can’t do or choose not to and there Nate is plodding away, his eyes on the prize.

Academically, athletically and most importantly spiritually, my olive shoot presses on, marches on.

Nate’s ordinary is everyone else’s incredible.

Bless him and all those who are joining him on the journey.

It’s like getting a little word present every week. You should check it out!

Ranger School

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Posted on February 25, 2013

Here’s what I am doing today. Gotta keep busy, no sense in idling my time and mind.

Somewhere between the hours of 10am-1pm on Sunday, my oldest olive shoot began Ranger School. While I sat in church, my Soldier was preparing for an exhausting journey that can last at least two months.

Since moms aren’t allowed at Ranger School, (HA!) the way I can help my OS is through support and prayer. The Hubs and the orange hair, freckle face OS gathered around the phone Saturday afternoon with Nate on the other line. Individually we offered prayers up to the Lord on Nate’s behalf. It is yet another humbling, raw moment which stretches me as a mama and a Christ follower.

The face of a Sugar Boy

Of course, as it is customary in my home, I prayed AND cried. It’s like a black bean quinoa burger with organic cheddar goat cheese. They just go together. I attempted to hold back my tears but that never works.

I’m proud, I’m scared, I’m worried, I’m completely confident.

I trust, I doubt, I second guess, I dream.

I borrow trouble, then I give it all to the Lord. And so it goes. Yes, it’s complicated. Don’t judge. ;0

Today I began writing my boy. As a word girl, this is therapeutic. I’m also a walker girl. If you see a pink-haired middle age woman walking down the street with a knee brace and maybe a back pack, she isn’t talking to herself and she isn’t crazy either (at least at that moment). She’s just talking to God. And she’s also listening. It’s not as weird as some of you might think. Or maybe it is and in that case, I feel sorry for you.

This is as close as we’re going to get to Nate for a while. I took this picture after we had finished talking and praying for him.

In a rare, authorized moment, I’m allowing you access to the first card I wrote Nate for Ranger School. You will note that I occasionally call him Sugar Boy. He has already told me that he will probably be throwing out all the cards once he reads them to minimize weight. For posterity sake, I might take pictures of the correspondence sent from our home since he might want to read it again someday.

According to the daily Ranger School roster, Nate and the other guys had a grueling physical activity test at 3 in the morning. If we don’t hear from him in the next three days, that’s a good sign. I can’t wait to hear about this incredible life experiences but then again, I can!

Nehemiah 1:11 O Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of your servant, and to the prayer of your servants who delight to fear your name, and give success to your servant today, and grant him mercy in the sight of this man.”

Motherhood gets easier and more difficult, that’s my story and I guess I’m sticking to it

Hearing God even when I don’t understand

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Posted on February 9, 2013

It still amazes me to read some verses in the Bible which don’t seem to have any relevance to my life and then literally, minutes later, my circumstances change and there I am screaming in my soul, “Lord, you are real! You speak to me in my secret heart!” May I never grow tired of these encounters with my ever-present, 100% dependable God!

But I am slow to learn and can be a skeptic when it comes to this invisible yet all-knowing God I worship.

A recent event has brought to mind a time when the Lord showed me how important it is for me to stay in His Word.

Enter my time machine, if you please. (Vaporous, non-toxic smoke appears briefly). Do not be afraid.

Three absolutely adorable olive shoots who got a mama who will bust your behind if you mess with them. Thank you.

About 10 years ago, I decided to read the entire Bible in one year. Each day had about 20 minutes total time reading verses from the Old Testament, New Testament, Psalms and Proverbs. I highly recommend doing this if you have never read the Bible from cover to cover for yourself.

Proverbs 7 from one of my most used Bibles.

Well, one afternoon I read some Bible verses that didn’t especially resonate with me. My day moved along per usual.

But then hours later, the phone rang.

It was a girl.

Calling not for my husband

but for my oldest olive shoot.

I had been reading Proverbs 7 – Seriously, read it if you are the mama of sons! Click here to read it!

Nate hung the phone up shortly afterward and I learned this girl had called with a few questions.

I was wearing my fluffy white robe and watching Crocodile Hunter at the time. Strange the things you remember when your world is about to get rocked.

She had asked if my son and his friend would go with her and her friend to the movies. And one more thing, could he also not tell his parents about it?

Instantly, the Bible verses I had only briefly considered came leaping into the forefront! Seriously??? The kid was in middle school! A clandestine meeting with a girl ain’t gonna happen on my watch!

Ok, darkness, I see you. Commence to stepping before it’s too late.

Not only did Nathan not go but we had him call the girl, decline her offer and then explain that HE wasn’t comfortable with her putting him in that position. He spoke gently to her giving her more respect than she had given herself. The girl never called again and continued to make poor choices.

Here I was thinking God’s Word was somehow not pertinent to me and like a dash of hot pepper sauce, a BAM came down from the heavens!

The same thing happened to me on Friday. I hastily did my daily reading after an eventful day which included taking my husband to the hospital among other things. (They thought he had damaged his spleen! He didn’t!).

I contemplated a chapter from an obscure book of the Bible (which I need to refrain from mentioning). It’s part of the 21 Day YouVersion challenge.

And then the phone rang.

Suddenly,

sadly,

strangely,

the words that didn’t apply –

did…

“Crud muffins,” I mutter to myself.

“Praise you, O God.” I also declare.

Today I wait expectantly for the truths I shall find and probably need sooner than I think.

If someone tells you the Bible is an ancient and irrelevant read,

or that God can’t actually speak to his people,

should they announce that His Word can’t help people in their present situation or their future,

send them my way.

Bless me, Mama

10 Comments

Posted on February 7, 2013

Here are just a few of the people I pray for on the regular.

My 16-year-old walks into the kitchen and I’m slicing strawberries. He’s got a basketball game in a few hours and is heading out the door.

“Bless me, Mama,” he says.

My thin, ginger wisp stands near my side by the sink.

This is the moment every Christian mom hopes will happen and today’s my day. This is cool. I’m going to write about this I vow to myself.

“Oh, ok, I can do that.” I stop slicing. My strawberry stained fingers lift into the air and words flow from my lips.

But no sooner did I finish the first sentence then Ike interrupts me and says,

“Mom, I didn’t mean it!”

You can’t be serious, Child.

That ginger in the jacket, yeah, that’s the kid I just prayed for!

For a second, I hesitated.

Then what did I do? I prayed for him anyway. #shablam

He had a great game. The team won. I did not cause these things by my prayers but I was obedient to the Lord.

Time and desire to pray have increased since beginning the YouVersion 21 Day Challenge. Other crazy, interesting things are also happening which perhaps I will share one day.

I love and admire this potato head.

But the words “Bless me, Mama” resonate within me again.

My oldest olive shoot begins pre-Ranger school tomorrow at 11:45. Gulp. He will sleep on the ground and be pushed to his physical and mental brink. Many fail, it is beyond challenging.

“Bless me, Mama” is my charge as his mother. Nathaniel, my gift, I speak blessings and success into your journey. Oh how I treasure you. Shine brightly.

My ministry-minded middle will soon speak to group of high school students. About the subject of love. Basically it’s his first preaching opportunity. Plus each Friday he goes into the inner city of Chicago to reach high risk young kids with the Gospel. “Bless me, Mama.” I do, Aaron, I do.

Aaron loves this ministry and the kids he meets! Thanks be to God!

May I be fruitful with all you have given me, My Holy One. Allow me to seize every opportunity to pray. Grant me knowledge to embrace ways to boldly proclaim your truth and loving kindness, as a mom, as a woman; every role I play, Father may it be so all the days of my life.

Amen

My Awesome Olive Shoots

chronicling a contented life as the mama of three sons

Category Archives: Nate

One day, three boys

Five minute Friday – remember

Five minute Friday – rest

Soldier Sauce

Five minute Friday – home

Five Minute Friday – ordinary

Ranger School

Motherhood gets easier and more difficult, that’s my story and I guess I’m sticking to it

Hearing God even when I don’t understand

If someone tells you the Bible is an ancient and irrelevant read,

or that God can’t actually speak to his people,

should they announce that His Word can’t help people in their present situation or their future,

send them my way.

Bless me, Mama

“Bless me, Mama,” he says.