“Oh, God, why did you give me these children???”
I have said these words
More than once
There have been times when I have exclaimed this in a most
screaming doleful and lamenting tone.
“OH GOD, WHY did you give me THESE children???
Those moments when mothering is troubling and my spirit is weary. When Nate screamed bloody murder in the bathtub for no reason at all or when Aaron threw handfuls of dirt on the carpet after repeatedly telling him to leave the dirt in the planter. When Ike flew into an angry tirade and it felt like body parts were exploding on the walls. And those are just a few of the stories I could share.
I suppose my OS have their own share of meltdown moments from me as well but we’re not going to talk about that. They can get their own blog and share those stories one day!
But in much larger measure, I have inquired of the Lord,
“oh God, why did you give ME these children?”
And I can’t say I have totally figured this out but I do see a theme and hear an answer when I enter the holy places of the Lord.
“They brought you closer to Me.” This is the refrain which resonates the most true.
With each successive olive shoot, my need for Jesus became clear. Here’s what I mean.
Nate taught me celebration. He was the toe-headed boy who began walking at eight months and wrote the words “hallelujah” in a prayer journal in elementary school. He is my adventurous, always-looking-for-a-challenge child currently plodding away at Ranger School.
My middle Aaron has been used by the Lord to instruct me on the value of submission. As a toddler, it was apparent we were well on our way to raising an absolutely adorable jerk. We had to implement structure and discipline into our home. When he bit into the face of the daycare director’s granddaughter like she was a hamburger at Bull City Burger, we knew something had to give.
And Ike, oh, my soul, my adorable, orange hair, freckle face OS, he is God’s lesson in absolute dependence on the Lord. The boy who nursed just on one side, pushed his food away as a toddler as if he had been served a bowl of salty mush, Ike has rocked my world in ways I never dreamed. He is ornery and tender-hearted, stubborn as a zit on a middle-age woman and contrite in spirit to the point where it brings me to tears.
Without each of my children, I’m not sure I would know Jesus. Thankfully I’ll never know! God placed each one of my olive shoots in my life to give me life eternally! The Hubs and I couldn’t do this family thing on our own with any measure of success without Him.
What about you? Have you ever wondered the same thing about your children? Why did God give you your babies? I’d love to hear!
Almost every day, I ask God why on earth he thought I could do this job. And then he reminds me that he never thought I could. He wanted me to ask him for help.
Meredith, that’s so cool and so very true. Not just for you and your sweet boy but for all of us. I love your comment and I’m terribly fond of you!
You are such a thoughtful and strong mama. What a blessed boy Henry is to have you as his mother.
what a beautiful heart offering you share with us! All three of your young men are fantastic. Made by God for His glory. And, yes, I ask myself the same question all the time!! And the answer is the same as yours…because they have helped me love God deeper and cling to Him with everything I have.
Amen Lizzie! I’m so encouraged to know that I’m not the only mom who has wondered this.
Love this post!! You have three amazing gifts from God. I ask myself the same question every day. Why in the world, God? And His answer is the same He gave you…so that your dependence on me would grow and your love for me would deepen. Boy has it ever!!
It’s a great question to ask, on the good days and on the bad! I so appreciate tough and loving moms such as you who cling closely to Jesus!
I don’t ask the questions of why any more. I guess there are more negative ‘whys’ in my life than positive ones. Too much pain wrapped up in ‘why’.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my children and I fiercely fight to do my best for them. Ultimately, the life that God has given me has given me a different perspective from those around me, including Christians. For the compassion it has taught me, I am thankful, for the patience it has taught me, I am thankful, for the knowledge of mercy, both given and received, I am thankful, for the comprehension of grace, I am thankful… Without that comprehension of grace, I would have given up. Also, without having been through all that I have been through, I would not now be married to a wonderful man with whom I am celebrating our 3rd anniversary 😀
Yes, it sounds like the Lord has uniquely placed you in a very special job as a mom. Your children are blessed to have you so faithfully by their side. I’m glad you have found a wonderful man who can support you in every way! Thanks for sharing! I welcome your comments!
LOL – I love this post! God has a sense of humor in all His teaching us lessons! 🙂
Thank you for posting this! I literally typed in google ‘why did God give me these kids’ and you popped up. Thank you…thank you for sharing. My son is like your boys. He is the sweetest dream or my worst nightmare depending on the second. At 3 and a half and more stubborn than even me sometimes, I wonder if he will ever use the toilet…or make it through a meal, or stop fixating on a desired toy or activity to the point of laying on the floor or ground, screaming, and not moving. Btw, he is strong and heavy. Thank you for pointing out the blessing in disguise. I am not sure of all of it or even some of it but thank you for the hope. I have few tears of relief that I am not alone. You have handsome boys.
I’m glad my post encouraged you. We can have many difficult days as moms and wonder how things will get better. We even have those days and our boys are much older. Stay strong in the Lord and trust in His mighty power. Do not give up on training your son to be a godly and righteous man. Be gentle with yourself but do not lose hope or focus. Glad you stopped by.