Category Archives: Lord

Little buddy Monday and Tuesday

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An absolutely adorable work in progress

An absolutely adorable work in progress

Well, two of my three children are in trouble.

I hate the term “grounded,” as it conjures up bad memories of my own rebellious adolescence so I will refrain from the terminology.

It could be a long and lonely summer at our house because unfortunately our guys are proving there is great truth in James 3:6

“The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body.”

So instead of being able to use their tongue in conversation with their friends, their punishment is to spend time with me.

It’s funny to consider that I am a form of punishment but it’s true.

Aaron, my middle OS had his iPod, book and electric guitar removed from his possession and it has been replaced with laundry, a vacuum and his Bible.

Everything is fine right now, he has apologized and we’re moving forward, thank goodness but restrictions are a consequence of his actions!

We have work to do and I’m not backing down on raising three godly young men of honor.

That’s my job and I can’t give up, can’t back down, wimp out, no way, ain’t gonna happen, nuh-uh, no way Jose.

With one son preparing to leave our nest and go off to West Point, my prayer is to see the two remaining guys ready to do amazing things in their lives. They don’t have to be cookie cutter fellas but my heart’s cry is for them to glorify the Lord in all they do.

So yesterday Isaac was my companion and today, well, both Aaron and Isaac are by my side. We could be spending a lot of time together if they don’t watch out.

Ike and I did errands and such and despite it being a punishment, I think he had some fun. I called it Little Buddy Monday and it looks like it’s Middle Buddy Tuesday also.

Instead of strumming the guitar or hanging out with friends, the guys went with me to Nate’s final pediatrician visit.

Nate got three shots, a TB test and three vials of blood drawn.

And to his chagrin, I documented a vast majority of it because I knew you would want to see.

Yes, we all looked like goobers but times like this are ending as my oldest OS begins his journey at West Point in a matter of weeks.

I only get one more shot (pardon the pun). I took this picture of the door when the guys and I were politely asked to leave for the more “personal” parts of the exam.

I ended up feeling a little wistful as I realized that my 18-year-old son is grown. He can see the pediatrician up to 21 years of age but who does that? I can so easily remember the days when these doctors were measuring his head circumference, checking for ear infections, etc.

Today Nate didn’t need nor want my hand to hold although when he had a woozy moment, I was able to stroke his peaked head (I think I needed it more than he did).

Now he is venturing off to grown up places and I entered the pediatrician’s office feeling like we were turning another page. I think it was a blessing it was Little Buddy Tuesday after all.

So our summer begins and parts of our life kind of end. Will there be a Little Buddy Wednesday? Probably! Who knows! Stay tuned!

This was Nate enjoying a little Motts Totts juice box to help him not pass out.

Sigh…

Words Aptly Spoken

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Most people look down on communications majors. They say it’s an easy major and not really that big of a deal. Some even chuckle and minimize the accomplishment amongst their Bachelor of Science kin but I think there’s real merit in a communications major, because, well, I am one. Ok, I know pre-med and accounting majors are crazy tough but I think there’s a lot to be said about well, saying things correctly. I feel so strongly about it that I have devoted a large portion of my life to that cause. And I have instilled this in my three OS, the value in being able to articulate their thoughts in a cogent and engaging manner. It has been a joy in my 18 years of motherhood to see my children flourish in this area of life. To think that I could have passed on a skill to my sons is incredibly humbling and rewarding. I have little to offer them athletically or intellectually. In fact, sometimes I think I don’t have much to give or offer, that the only things they could ever get from me are less than admirable qualities. (just being real here) Maybe that’s why this means so much. 


However, last week I saw the Lord bestow a gift upon me. I saw my oldest OS  address his high school class for one last time. Nathan was selected by his classmates to be one of a few chosen students asked to impart some final thoughts to his fellow seniors, underclassmen and their families. At the senior assembly, Nathan sent a charge to those left behind. He deftly handled the microphone and boldly proclaimed a powerful message. I have included a YouTube link if you want to see it. It’s a little hard to hear but so sweet. Worth 3:47 minutes of your life. 


This week, my middle OS will also speak. He will address his middle school classmates. As the student body president for middle school, Aaron will offer his reflections upon his time in middle school. I have heard snippets of this presentation and I think it is quintessentially Spurny (my nickname for my boy which only his family is allowed to call him so don’t even try).

In a few weeks, I will be speaking at a high school baccalaureate to about 500 people and I pray my words will be as wise and clever as my children’s. This will be a daunting task so please pray that I will only share the words the Lord desires in a cogent and engaging manner. (sound familiar?)

I beamed with pride as I watched my beautiful child wax so eloquently. Here are a few of my favorite quotes,

“Don’t think that you have to be a straight A student to do well because life isn’t about grades and you are much more than your report card. You are the son or the daughter of the King of the Universe and He deserves nothing less than your best.”

“My parting message to you is to always do your best no matter what happens and no matter what life throws at you. In the end, you must do your best because you know that you are working for someone for greater than yourself. You’re not working for your parents or your teachers, you’re working for Jesus.”

If we are able to tape Aaron’s message, I will also post a link. Today I simply pause and puff with pride (in a motherly and most appropriate way, not cocky or boastful, but rather in a humbling and deeply thankful way) and consider this…

Proverbs 25:11
“A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”

Trying not to cry, I simply say…

Amen

Awkward carrot

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My dad amidst his bountiful tomatoes.

My dad amidst his bountiful tomatoes.

My dad was an avid gardener and I guess I thought it might be in the “genes” as they say.

But I do not have a green thumb.

The Hubs and I are not great landscapers and do not have an eye for flora and fauna.

A while back, we decided we would try a garden.

I love fresh veggies and would take a fresh, warm tomato over a piece of chocolate any day.

Over the weekend, Mark was weeding the “garden” when he traipsed on into the house with this…probably the funniest looking vegetable I’ve ever seen!

According to the seed packet, we should have enjoyed this carrot and all its orange friends a LONG time ago. Our carrot has taken a major time to grow, to say the least

There is a spiritual connection to all this. The Bible speaks about bearing fruit, fruit that will last (John 15:16).

So let me ask you a personal question, what kind of fruit are you growing?

According to the seed packet, we should have enjoyed this carrot and all its orange friends a LONG time ago.

Our carrot has taken a major time to grow, to say the least.

How are you maturing in the Lord?

Can you see growth or development or are you in a weird kind of place, stuck in a rut for years, much like our carrot?

Do you know how long it took for this beauty to grow?

Three years.

That’s right, for three years we have been waiting for something to sprout from our pitiful little garden.

Take a look at the picture, I think it must be a boy carrot. How perfect that a mom of three SONS would receive such a treasure! We have had a lot of laughs with its most awkward shape and at the risk of impropriety, I had to share it.

But I pray you find yourself bearing fruit of a most abundant variety from your verdant figurative garden of faith and if you’re so inclined, from the literal garden the one you might be growing this season.

These boots are made for walking

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One of my favorite songs growing up was the Barbara Sinatra’s (Frank’s daughter) song “These boots are made for walking.”

As a little girl, I would put on a pair of boots and strut all over the house singing this song – full of attitude and sass.

Now fast forward, nearly 40 years later, that song comes back into my head because over the weekend, we went to Fort Bragg and bought Nathan a pair of combat boots.

It’s been highly recommended that he break them in before reporting to West Point on June 30. Fort Bragg is quite a place.

p1010916If you’re looking for a tattoo, a nudie girl joint or a hot dog, then I’d highly recommend Fort Bragg.

I didn’t find the place especially sophisticated or refined!

For this suburban mama, I was missing some of my creature comforts but at least we were able to get Nate his boots and he’s definitely walking in them.

When in the military recommended going to the mini-mall on base, I thought I could get some cool things at a cheap price. That wasn’t really the case.

We had to get our car inspected, our IDs checked, driver registration confirmed just to get on the base. Pretty serious stuff. I didn’t get anything special at the mini-mall unless of course you count that I got hit on by a little Eastern Indian fella. He started talking to me while I was looking at work-out clothes. It was creepy and I certainly didn’t expect it. At first I couldn’t even believe it was happening. My mom heard me talking to someone and then saw me scooting over to her. Finding love at the commissary definitely wasn’t on my agenda! Just give me the stinkin’ boots!

p1010912Since I was absolutely forbidden to take random photos of Nathan trying on boots, (which I wanted to do for you, my blog friends), I had to be very conservative with my picture-taking.

Nathan took a few of the crew comprised of Isaac, Mom and me. I don’t think any of us are fit for duty. The military isn’t that desperate – YET! Thank goodness!

Now we need to order his dress shoes. The ones without polish because at West Point you polish your shoes to perfection.

My own feet ache thinking about all the walking and running my boy is going to do in just two months. My heart hurts too but that’s for another post…probably a lot more posts.

West Point Mom = me

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p1010889The wait is over. The package arrived.

Our son has been accepted to United States Military Academy – West Point!

We were told that if Nathan was rejected, we would receive a phone call; if he was accepted, he would receive a package.p1010896

Just as I was ready to go and speak in a middle school, my husband calls and says, “Nathan got a package from West Point.”

It must have nearly killed Mark to not open the contents but he resisted temptation. p1010891

p1010905Mark captured the moment on camera. This is a very big deal. Our son will report to West Point bright and early 6:30 AM on June 30!

He will attend six weeks of rigorous training (affectionately known as Beast) and after successful completion, begin his 47 month journey at West Point.

I did not grow up in a military family so this is all so new to me.

New terminology, new people, new experiences for all of us, especially our son.

Our family will take him there and say goodbye and not hear much from him most of the summer.

I am not crying as I type this which shocks me.

I am proud, scared, overjoyed, nervous, excited, thrilled, sad and every feeling in between.

I know the Lord is teaching all of us some lessons and has placed all these pieces together for His glory.

I am the mama of a soldier, whoa.

The next step onto West Point

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Today Nathan got a phone call from the local West Point recruiter.

He is a 1993 graduate and wants to meet my son.

The guy is coming by the school this Wednesday to answer Nathan’s questions and maybe meet with the principal.

One of the things I have appreciated through this whole process is how everyone seems to be very upfront and honest about what it takes to go to West Point Military Academy.

They aren’t sugar-coating this experience; I feel like we are getting an honest appraisal, perhaps more than at a traditional university. 

My son is Army strong but am I?

He can learn to run in the freezing cold and understand military strategy.

He will be able to scale walls and carry a rifle with ease.

But me, y’all, I am so terribly weak and vulnerable. I am such a wimp. Probably can’t even do a decent push up if my life depended on it.

I’m not talking about my physical strength.
I know that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me, I have to tuck that truth deep into my heart.

I know that when I am weak, He is strong. What would I do without my Heavenly Father right beside me? As my friend Janice reminded me, the Lord knows what it’s like to give up your beloved son. While we were walking on the campus, I began to cry as I thought about my dad.

He never met any of my children having died when he was only 44 years old.

Warm tears streamed down my face as I thought about how proud he would have been of his grandson.

I thought my mother-in-law who is with the Lord now and wondered what she would had to say?

Thanks to some sage counsel from another friend, my husband reminded Nathan of this; he is going to a success wherever he goes. Mark is always a source of encouragement and perspective.

When Nathan was staying overnight in the barracks, he called to check in.

I asked my OS, “Well, what do you think? Do you want to go to West Point?”

He gave me the best answer I could have wanted, “I like it but I’m praying about it.”

Visiting West Point for the very first time

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We arrived at the Admissions Office at 8 am on Friday.

Since that time we have learned a lot of impressive things about West Point.

I am honored that my son is even considering this place.

West Point has a nobility about it that I haven’t felt at other universities.

Having not grown up in a military family, it’s strange walking around in a camouflage-colored campus where people all walk the same and salute each other.

General Patton with Quote

This beautiful print is available through a talented USNA and USMA mom. Check it out here!

I’m not saying I don’t like it, it’s just a whole new culture. You don’t see any dread locks in anyone’s hair or piercings or tattoos, no facial hair either. It’s a very clean-cut campus body.

West Point info we learned:

4,400 students attend

7 to 1 student/teacher ratio – This is less than in elementary school!

81% graduation in four years

Upon graduation cadets commit to five years of service in the Army – this is a very serious commitment

It’s estimated that a West Point education is worth $448,000.

Robert E. Lee, Ulysses S. Grant, Dwight D. Eisenhower, Omar Bradley, Norman Schwarzkopf are just some of the notable graduates

Wake up time: 5:00, not 5:01, not 5:15.

It’s not pretty if you don’t wake up on time.

If Nathan goes there, it should be a VERY interesting considering time to see how he does with that.

Considering how much prodding his brothers do to get him up at 7 am, I wonder how he will adjust.

Your room stays clean. Impeccably clean.

I mean so clean not even a hair should be on the ground.

You don’t want a hair on the ground or a dust bunny or anything out of place. It’s not pretty. You will walk the plain (a large flat field on campus) or worse.

When we were walking around the campus, Mark was impressed with how many cadets called him, “sir” as he passed them by.

I only heard some cuss word while on campus.

When we visited another university, the cuss words were flying all over the place. I’m not saying they don’t use them (wouldn’t that be nice, though), it was such a totally different atmosphere.

I’m praising the Lord that I brought my trusty long undies as I was able to handle the chilly temp thanks to the layers of clothing. I wasn’t exactly working it but sometimes you have to forgo high fashion, you know what I mean?

I have cried at least six times but not in an embarrassing way. One time, yesterday morning, the lieutenant mentioned something about saying good-bye to your family and I almost lost it.

I drew a deep breath, getting ready to let loose of a few years but immediately Nathan looked over at me (he knows me pretty well) and I knew I had to try and get myself together. I sucked the tears back in and waited until Mark and I were together to let a few fall from my eyes.

We are awaiting news on his eye exam and physical so he hasn’t been officially accepted yet.

Nothing is a done deal yet.

My sugar boy and me. I'm not a flyer btw.

My sugar boy and me. I’m not a flyer btw.

However, I have to accept is this – I have to accept and yield God’s will for my son’s life whether it’s at West Point or somewhere else.

The Lord and not me, determine my precious boy’s future. We are earnestly praying and if I get ahead of myself, I’m a wreck but if I stay in the moment, I can handle things. It is obvious the Lord is using this experience to make us lean into Him more and more.

We pick Nate up at 1 pm and we’ll learn more about his overnight time with a cadet. Check back for more details as we continue on this incredible journey.

If you like the picture posted in this blog, check out this talented artist’s prints. She’s a USNA and a future USMA mom!

Don’t see Spelling Bee!

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Our family went to the Raleigh Memorial Theatre today for a Broadway play. I was looking forward to doing something cultural and artsy with all our boys. Instead it was a horrible disappointment and we ended up walking out of the performance before intermission. We went to see “Spelling Bee” and I wish every seat had been empty. This was supposed to be a play about a spelling bee, for goodness sake but there was an agenda that had NOTHING at all to do with it. I love words and spelling. I am the type of person who stops to take pictures of typos, this sounded like my kind of show. Instead it was disgusting. 

Several offensive comments and jokes kicked off the show. I was confused from the very start about the premise of the whole thing. We heard jokes about sexual orientation, jokes about politics, jokes about Hispanics, jokes about things I won’t write about because they are completely inappropriate and you would be offended (and rightly so). 
I heard a few people behind us, who had brought a children, groan and squirm. At times, it felt like the audience was growing cold and weary. We certainly were. But the absolute worst assault of all was when all the performers sang in unison “G-D it!” during one of the songs. All the performers sang it gleefully. Sickening! My spirit sank and I was angry. I looked over and noticed Nate’s jaw tighten and 11 year old Isaac peering over at me. Everything about staying felt wrong. But my husband had given me these tickets as a Christmas present! We had spent over $250 on these tickets! That’s a lot of money! Some of my readers might be wondering why we stayed even a second longer. I am not sure, we have since apologized to our children. They broke out in song and used the Lord’s name in vain again. There was an embarrassing joke about boy’s anatomy and it was clear to us, it was time to go. I am happy that we walked out during the performance so it was obvious five people, a family, were leaving. My prayer is that it gave permission for others to follow suit.
When we spoke to the theatre manager, he said he has heard this from other people. He totally appreciated our perspective. There was nothing glorifying about this event. They were not especially talented or funny either. We had used our Sunday afternoon for this event and had gone just after leaving church. The manager gave Mark the name of his boss and Mark has already called demanding a full refund. This was not a family oriented show. It was a disgrace. 
We walked out from the theatre and I felt like I could breathe again. 
The sun was shining, the day was not lost. I praise the Lord that those words stung so deeply because I have been delivered. Friends, for many years, I must confess, those terrible words found residence on my own tongue. 

I hate sharing this. Lord, please forgive me. But as horrible as this play and those words are, I think it would have been worse to still be sitting in those chairs with my precious husband and babies and not feel anything at all.
 
“But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you wholeheartedly obeyed the form of teaching to which you were entrusted. You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness. 
I put this in human terms because you are weak in your natural selves. Just as you used to offer the parts of your body in slavery to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer them in slavery to righteousness leading to holiness.”
Romans 6:17-19

Sometimes it pays to listen to a 13 year old

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p1000563It was Isaac’s 5th grade Christmas band concert.

Last year I took my mom to the big event and we were late.

It is not a good thing to be late for Isaac’s special events. He has a wonderful memory when it comes to those types of things.

He’s kind of like me, his mother, with stuff like that.

We take things personally and our feelings get hurt easily.

Instead of running a quick errand at the mall, Mom and I decided we weren’t going to chance it and instead determined to be there on time. We were quite proud of ourselves when we stepped into the gym where the concert was last time and only four other people were there.

p1000567We puffed with pride and I eagerly told Mom to smile as I clicked away at the camera to pass the time away until everybody arrived.

I wanted to capture this moment to show Isaac how we were at the concert WAY ahead of all the other moms and dads and grandparents.

Since it looked like we had a lot of time and perhaps everyone else was just running late, I took a series of photos of my mom posing for the camera.

Here she is waving at the camera, showing Isaac that she had a front row seat to the Christmas concert.

We were acting silly and feeling very good about our punctuality until my middle OS Aaron noticed us in the gym. He was on his way to attend Isaac’s concert as well and he spotted us in the gym.

Aaron 8th grade picThat’s when my oh so wise 13-year-old Aaron informed us that we were in the wrong place.

The concert was in the new auditorium.

I insisted that Aaron was wrong but he didn’t relent.

Skeptically Mom and I and the other four women made our way to the auditorium.

We opened the thick auditorium doors and noticed the throng of people! We were hardly the first people to arrive in fact, if Aaron hadn’t found us, we could easily still be sitting there!

P1000579

We got to hear him play! So sweet!

We still got a pretty decent seat and Isaac was pleased to see us in the right place, right on time! Whew!

I’m learning there are sometimes when it’s best to heed your kids’ advice instead of the other way around 😉