Category Archives: Ike

The Jenga Challenge

3 Comments

I’m not sure why this happened. I don’t consider myself a negligent mother. All I did was ask the guys to play a game upstairs. We were having a snow day, the boys needed to thaw out after killing each other with snowballs. Sounds simple enough, right? The boys were playing Jenga and every now and then I’d hear the familiar sounds of toppling Jenga blocks. 

But while in the kitchen, I thought I saw a blurry image of a child darting to the front door. The next thing I heard was laughter and then two children, more specifically two of MY children, shutting the front door and coming back inside. Hmmm… 


It’s then that I learned about the Jenga Challenge. The boys weren’t merely playing an innocent game of Jenga in the tv room. They were scheming and the game of Jenga had VERY high stakes. The loser of Jenga wouldn’t just face the humiliation of defeat indoors, he would have to face the brutal weather outside as well. I was completely ignorant of this diabolical plan. If you haven’t yet, take a moment and watch this little video. 

After filming this video and showing it to me, about an hour later, the “loser” of this video announced to me that he really wasn’t feeling well. He has been in bed ever since. 

My favorite line is when Isaac, the victor, exclaims through his giggles, “Quickly, before Mom sees!”

I guess it was fun while it lasted, huh? 

Mr. Grumpy Box of Crayons and a Little Wiggle

5 Comments

The final theme for Spirit Week in middle school was TV characters. Again, my friend Michele and I masterminded what we believed would be the most epic of all ideas for TV character days not only at our kids’ school but quite possibly ever in the history of mankind. What we didn’t know was that there were other moms with some crazy ideas of their own.  After kicking around a few ideas, we asked our boys what about being the international children’s Australian music group sensation, The Wiggles? To our surprise, our guys said yes! 


I was pleased that Ike was willing to be a Wiggle. He is my subdued child and far more self-conscious. Not only did Michele’s son and my boy decide on being The Wiggles but they recruited two of their buddies to be the two remaining band members! Michele and I went full-force with our plans. She bought t-shirts for all four of them and created The Wiggles iron-on transfers and expertly applied the logos to the front of each shirt. 

Then after lunch one day, Michele and I found black hairspray. When Ike came home, he was eager to try it out. I took him outside as to not make a mess indoors and put a few squirts of the black hairspray on his hair. His lovely orange hair began to turn the ugliest shade of gray I’d ever seen in my life. It turned a thick, lifeless gray and to make matters worse, the hairspray became powdery on his head. We also probably destroyed another ozone layer in the process. Sorry about that. 

The next morning Isaac woke early. After he put his Wiggles t-shirt on, I placed him in the tub and began lacquering his hair. A thin film of powder covered his head. Before my eyes, my sweet 12 year old son had turned into an aging Wiggle. I gave him some dark eyebrows with my eyebrow pencil and once he got the blue plastic recorder I bought at the Dollar Tree, Ike’s transformation was complete. Ike trepidatiously walked into the sixth grade hall searching for his aging band mates. Their moms had also bought the hairspray and they all complained about the gross stuff in their hair in the corridor. 

 
The hallway exploded with energy. One student was the Cookie Monster and he passed around cookies to everyone he saw. Another guy was the FreeCreditReport.com guy complete with a little pirate outfit and guitar. 

But I think my personal favorite TV character was Billy Mays from OxyClean!  This student was a hoot because he absolutely personified spokesman Billy Mays. He had a penciled-in beard, toted around his OxyClean bottle and recited the entire OxyClean schtick!

Ike said everywhere Derek went, he was trying to sell his product! Smiles and laughter, cookies and cleaning products, music and merriment, what could possibly be better!

And then there was Aaron. The grand finale of high school Spirit Day was Crayon Day. Poor fella was clueless about what to do. 

After a long night of homework, Aaron began working on his costume after 11pm. Ingeniously, my middle OS turned a grocery bag inside out, grabbed some markers, a bottle of White-Out and my resourceful child became a box of Crayons. 

With little sleep, Aaron was pretty unpleasant the next morning. He was Mr. Grouchy Box of Crayons even in the car as these pictures clearly demonstrate. 

It probably didn’t help that his annoying parents took a million pictures and found the whole thing terribly amusing!

I miss Spirit Week but am kind of glad things are back to normal…I’m already thinking about next year’s plans!

Pajama Day for the Record Books

5 Comments

The suspense has got to be killing you…so far I have shared that Spirit Week in our family is a BIG deal. We take Spirit Week seriously and bring it, if you know what I mean. But what I haven’t shared is the final result. 

After all the exhaustive effort, the travail, at last Pajama Day was at hand.

I had finished my middle OS’s pajama pants around 11:30pm Sunday night, the costume was ready. 

Before I reveal the actual outfit, you need some background. We have a standing joke in my family that I have yet to grow tired of saying. True, everybody in my family is tired of hearing this joke but that’s beside the point. Here it is…every time my sons eat something healthy, especially if it is green, I tell them something marvelous is going to happen to them in the near future. A very special, VERY manly thing that will leave them eternally gratefully for having me as their mom and for having eaten that healthy, green thing. 

I tell them that thanks to eating that healthy thing and having me as their mom, they are going to grow chest hair. And not just little tufts here and there, my friends. Not just a random hair on a barren land, oh no, we’re talking prolific amounts of chest hair, a veritable yet tasteful explosion of virulity and testorone will arrive shortly. 


Essentially I say the same thing each time but I have a knack for making it sound fresh and new. For example, Ike will be sitting at the dinner table, eating/being forced to eat some salad and I will affirm him by saying, “Isaac, that salad is going to grow a centimeter of hair on your chest one day!” Or recently when they tried/were forced to try brussels sprouts, I encouraged my youngest OS after he ate/choked one of them down with these supportive words, “Oh, Ike just you wait, Man.  You are so gonna grow some chest hair!”  

How does that relate to Pajama Day?…take a look at these pictures, dear friends…

To the untrained eye, this might look like real chest hair. That would be wrong. On one of my million trips to the fabric store, I purchased some fake fur. My expert (HA!) seamstress skills allowed me to sew some “chest hair” onto a ripped t-shirt. I wanted to sew “back hair” also but felt close to exhaustion.  
Aaron played the part to the hilt, from the beginning of the morning at home till the end of school that afternoon, my boy scratched his newly sprouted chest hair to the disgust of all the freshman girls and possibly some of the teachers. I don’t think it is humanly possible to have more fun with chest hair, real or otherwise, than we had that day!

Unless something new develops, I’ll soon blog about the new painting in our house from a talented and aspiring artist, as well as Mr. Grumpy Box of Crayons and The Wiggles AND a certain Cadet of the Quarter I know quite well and the new SNUGLET model who might one day seriously be strutting the cat walk! 😉 Stay tuned and come back soon, love to hear from you if you have enjoyed any of these posts. 

Things Always Take A Lot Longer Than You Realize

1 Comment

So if you have been with me so far you know that Spirit Week is a big deal in our family. The resourcefulness, creativity and fun my OS and I put into the week makes my little mama’s heart soar. I feel as if I am in the TMZ, the Total Mama Zone, like I am racking up some serious AMP, Amazing Mama Points. 

But that nearly came to a screeching halt the Sunday before Spirit Week began. Michele and I decided to get together after church and make three pair of pajama pants and corresponding appliques. 

My bff prepared some tasty chicken cabbage soup and fresh pineapple and afterward I realized that I had brought the wrong pajama pants patterns to her house. We rushed back to my house, grabbed the patterns and scurried up to her craft room. At this point, we were slightly behind our imaginary schedule but not too concerned.

The mood was lively and jovial as we cut the material and set to the task of cranking those pj pants out in record time. Our machines were purring like kittens and I was especially excited to be using a stitch on my machine I had never used. It’s funny the things people, (ok, not everybody, but some people, like me) can get excited about…maybe it’s like a guy using a new kind of nail or a fancy hammer, I don’t know.

Ike took pictures to document the day. Surely we will be done with these before dinner, Michele and I mused. Yeah, right. Michele spoke these ominous words repeatedly, “things always take a lot longer than you realize,” and that became a foreboding truism as the day grew longer and longer and longer. 

I believe this picture is Michele’s “things always take a lot longer than you realize” face.  

When the two boys tried on the pj pants, we made some changes and started more custom sewing. Scott is small and his pants were gi–normous. Then Ike felt like his pants were pretty huge too. I guess sixth grade guys don’t like their pants poofy. We plodded on.


And then there was me. Michele wanted to make simple elastic
 waistbands but I lobbied for them to have elastic waistbands and matching draw strings. I assured her it wouldn’t take too much longer since both of our machines can make buttonholes. We could whip those out in no time at all. She complied and we still remained optimistic. We could doey it! 

Admittedly though we were getting a tired and a little punchy. Michele also said she never sews at night…too many mistakes. Daylight was slipping away and although we were making progress but it was apparent she would be working into the night. 

I averted a horrible accident and a nice little trip to the ER when I narrowly missed digging/shoving/implanting a pin into my right knee. I guess I needed to cut something and with one fell swoop, my knee/pajama pants all hit the carpet simultaneously. It was only then that I felt a little pin in the material breeze past my bent knee. Oh, how I praised Jesus that that unsanitary pin didn’t get rammed up there! All I could think about was some medical show I watched recently about a woman with a needle in her knee and wow, it was really, really gross! 


We weren’t lazy and we talked while we sewed but there were no coffee or cigarette breaks (HA!) Why was it past six o’clock and these pants were still not done! Ike tried on his pajama pants and got fitted more times when he probably will when he gets a tux for his wedding! 

And the buttonholes were a mess. Maybe the machines were getting as tired as the seamstresses behind them. But we plugged along and bless her heart, when we realized that I hadn’t made enough drawstrings, Michele forged ahead and completed the job. 

It was past 7pm and the end was near, at least for this project. Though my shoulders and neck were screaming, I think the satisfaction of spending time with my friend and doing something for my son and his buds made it all worthwhile. That is until Ike started to have second thoughts on the way home and panicked about what people were going to say. I tried my best to remain calm which was a feat in itself. 

I made dinner with the help of my family and immediately after shoveling in the last bit of chicken manicotti, I whipped out my trusty sewing machine and worked on Aaron’s Thomas the Tank Engine pj pants.

Why did we do this? I’ll tell you why. Love. Pure, unadulterated, mushy mama love, that’s why. Love for my children, love for his friends, love of my friend, a chance to bless. I don’t regret a minute of it even though I was exhausted. 

And check these out! First, check out Ike’s face as he got ready to walk into his class with Orange Train emboldened on his chest! Aren’t they adorable! Here are the guys workin‘ it with their matching pajama pants and appliqued t-shirts. They were a big hit at the middle school and I’m already thinking about next year’s design. Yes, I’m insane. 

And Aaron’s Thomas the Tank Engine pajama pants, just when I thought I had nothing left in me, well, those pajama pants were about to rock my world…I’ll blog about that next.

PJ Pants

2 Comments

Now that Ike’s in sixth grade, what kind of mother would I be if I didn’t make him his first pair of custom-designed pajama pants for Spirit Week? 


Answer: I would be the worst mother in the world, that’s whom I’d be! Not saying that YOU are a horrible mom of a middle schooler if you haven’t made a your child custom-designed pajama pants for Spirit Week, I’m only talking about myself! No guilt zone, k?

As I talked with my friend, Michele, we agreed that since our sons are besties, we would make them matching pajamas. Then we considered another one of their good buds and decided to offer to make some for him too. When I suggested to Michele that we could probably crank out maybe even pj pants for two other kids, Michele was quick to use her assertive communication skills and say, “NO!” I am very thankful for her common sense because it preserved both my sanity and our friendship!

After a basketball game, Michele and I took our two boys to one of a sixth grade boys’ favorite stores…JoAnn Fabrics. Oh noooooo, they didn’t feel too awkward looking through all the material! Hungry and tired after the game, we were relieved when when we finally found the perfect material but then discovered there wasn’t enough of it to make three pj pants so guess what we got to do? That’s right…we got to take our tired and starving 12 year boys to their second favorite store…Hancock Fabrics! Try it sometime. If you have a 12 year old son and he complains about having nothing to do, offer to take him to a fabric store and see what happens! So much fun!

Our stomachs were growling and with only 15 minutes before closing time, we all settled on this fabric. It had to be the perfect blend of not too serious so people thought it was lame and not too babyish so people aka the dreaded eighth graders wouldn’t mercilessly mock and shame our sons for the remainder of their lives. That is not the easiest thing to do by the way. Michele and I planned on beginning our sewing project on Saturday and we were going to crank these pj pants out in no time at all…


Famous last words…

Having fun during Spirit Week – W-H style

5 Comments

Every year at my children’s school, there is an opportunity to ditch their school uniforms and participate in Spirit Week. It has become five days my sons look forward to from the first day of school. Spirit Week is a time for the kids to let loose, as much as is humanly possible in a private Christian school and just have some fun. Truly a rare and welcome treat. 

But my sons are not the only people in our family who anticipate Spirit Week. I do too! For the last several years, it has become a tradition in our family, mostly instituted by me that when it’s Pajama Day, and there is always a Pajama Day during Spirit Week, well, the W-H’s, we are gonna represent. We are going to bring it! We are going to take it to the limit, no holds barred and therefore no ordinary pajamas will suffice. Whether they like it or not, I determine to make my OS their very own, “designer” pajama pants.

One year our two oldest OS wore a matching rubber ducky pj’s. Nate wasn’t exactly overjoyed about being twins with his dorky middle school brother but I had some spare material around the house and whipped those pj’s out pretty quickly during the Super Bowl game. They were quite a hit at school not to mention super comfy and that fed my addiction to purpose to make more pajama pants for Spirit Week. 


But before I tell you about our current Spirit Week events and ideas, let’s take a journey back and visit Spirit Weeks of days gone by.

There was the time when Nate dressed up as a Super Hero…I believe he was Super Nate…Not sure what his super powers were but we always think of him as Super Nate! 

I cannot take credit for the costume he created except to say I helped him put the N on the back of his cape. 

And who could forget Nerd Day? Aaron took that day VERY seriously and if you know him, he’s such a un-nerdy guy. Nonetheless, he wore a computer tie the boys bought him years ago at the flea market. Shockingly, I believe Aaron is the only person to have ever worn this tie. Even when I have told Mark that his kids bought it especially for him for Christmas, he still hasn’t put the thing around his neck. At least someone has gotten good use of it after all these years. 

Last year Aaron was Prince Charming. 

I made golden silk pajama pants which I hemmed at the knees and a felt vest. (Obligatory ew–ing and ah-ing from my readers, please!) 

We then made a golden crown out of poster board and glued beautiful authentic plastic jewels which surely bedazzled the ladies. We even went to the Goodwill and got him a shoe to carry around the entire day as he searched for his Cinderella who was nowhere to be found.  
I’m not sure what Nate was this year but I think he had limited time, talent and resources so I think he was Captain Hook…check out the black Lady Godiva wig we have used for countless weird things. Oh and don’t forget the “hook” made out of aluminum foil. 


There was Favorite Bible Character Day…Nate was Noah…check out the stuffed animal on his cardboard ark. He duct-taped the defenseless teddy bear to the ark!

I just had to tell you about our past experiences before I got you up to date on what we’ve been working on currently. Next blog…Spirit Week 2009…and the NINE hour sewing project which nearly killed me…and I’m not even exaggerating. More soon,

Happy Birthday!

2 Comments

Here are some fun things we got Ike for his 12th birthday!

I found this simple awesome book, “You Gotta Be Kidding!51Z2k-utL8L” by Randy Horn.

It is a crazy book of “would you” questions.

Would you rather
Turn into a fly
OR
turn into a cockroach?

Would you rather
Have no teeth and try to eat a big bowl of caramel popcorn
OR
try to eat four bagels?

Would you rather
Get poison ivy all over your rear end
OR
between all your fingers and toes?

Out of all the gifts we gave our youngest OS, so far this book seems to be the gift he likes the most.

Ike completely grossed me out as we drove to my nephew Jon’s 3rd birthday party. Anytime a 12 year old can repulse his mom is a good day. Although I can usually keep pace with my three OS in the gross department, I must say You Gotta Be Kidding pushed me to the limit. By the time we arrived, I had more than a day’s worth of disgusting questions about spit and pus. It was fun though, I think it will elicit some interesting dinnertime conversations!

974890_1_ftc_dpThen Ike got a new CD collection of Adventures in Odyssey stories.

You should listen to this wonderful series of radio programs by Focus on the Family. Ike learns Biblical truth in an entertaining and educational way and whenever I join him, I always find a fresh word from the Lord.

They aren’t preachy or lecturing, they are humorous and truly worthwhile. You can also listen to the series on the radio with this link. Ike does this all the time, too!

And I found this Flip-to-Win hangman travel game for Ike. It is a wooden game with an erasable whiteboard and self-storing dry-erase marker. It should be cool to use when we make longer car rides and I’m hoping Ike will let me borrow this for my trip to El Salvador on Nov. 1551i-YcC+PSL._SX342_.

Mark was out of town on Ike’s birthday but being the great daddy he is, he wrote on a card for his boy.

In the card, Mark included a handmade coupon entitling Isaac to his all-time favorite dinner.

Crab legs.

Isaac has been asking for crab legs since the last time he had them. I think if our growing boy actually paid for crab legs, he would ask less often!

So after eating pizza and birthday cake at Jon’s b-day, we went to Sam’s Club and I purchased $47 worth of giant Alaskan king crab legs. We gorged on the ocean’s delectable treasures.

Sounds like a fitting way to celebrate our sweet boy! Psalm 127:3 “Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from him.”

And the winner is…

2 Comments

Thanks for all your suggestions about blog posts. I am particularly impressed with apeasofmylife and thehokeypokeyplace‘s challenge to combine all three of my potential posts into one. I appreciate your confidence in my ability but I’m not sure I’ve got it in me. 

 
So I hope you can settle with my post being about…


BRAINS (I will do posts about boxing and beds in the near future, promise!) 

Just as I was finishing up my time with a broken foot, Ike decided to tear some ligaments in his foot! Can you believe it??? Last Sunday, I went to church with my orthopedic boot and Isaac on crutches. People are beginning to get worried about us! With limited mobility and a two week fall break in front of us, I had to do something with my son since running and basketball were out of the question. That’s when I came up with a brilliant idea…let’s make a brain! 

With our oldest OS away at West Point, we could use an extra brain around the house. He’s like the smartest guy in our family and we have been feeling his intellectual absence. Maybe your family thinks they are super duper intelligent, we know we’re not. No sense in trying to pretend. 

You might think brains are made of grey matter but that would be wrong, my friends (said in a John McCain-y kind of voice;).  Bet you didn’t know that brains are actually made of corn starch, gelatin, water and food coloring! And incidentally, they smell kind of icky too.


For Christmas last year we bought our OS a Disgusting Anatomy Brain kit with Bonus Eyeball Kit! It’s been sitting in the closet ever since then and so on a beautiful autumn day, we began to make our disgusting brain. 

Isaac stirred the gelatin into the water then the corn starch and in no time at all, our brain was placed into the mold to congeal overnight. Amidst the fresh produce and condiments, there sat our brand new brain, chilling out.

And it was ready just in time, too. As this video clip demonstrates, suddenly we found a family member in DIRE need of a brain. That sometimes happens with 14 year olds…

We sure were glad to have that slimy brain ready for delivery! We performed a minor lobotomy and thank goodness, Aaron has a mind of his own!

(This is part one)
We still have enough stuff to make at least one more brain, give us 24 hours and we can have one ready for you too!  

Mothering is fun! 

Public Service Announcement

3 Comments

Warning: Portions of this post may be objectionable. They are not perverted or inappropriate but gross. Not gross as in violent or nasty but gross as in revolting and slightly amusing if you are into that sort of thing. If you have a queasy stomach or a sensitive constitution, read this post instead. Consider yourself warned. Thank you for your time.


Isaac had his first soccer match yesterday. My DH and I got into the car ready for this exciting event and the most foul smell poured out of the inside of the car. Like the smell took my breath away. It was a hot and humid day and it was almost like you could see little waves of odor emanating from the vehicle.

I waited for Mark to start the car and put my scooter in the back seat. No way was I getting into that car without some circulation. I’ve got enough to deal with with my broken foot and all. It was physically impossible to enter the car with this sensory assult. We were completely confused as to the origin of this smell, but then I spotted the offender. A small cup of applesauce was on the back seat. Apparently one of the guys left a bit of their lunch on my husband’s back seat. My nose and every olfactory particle of my being was disgusted as I plopped into the front seat. Instantly my husband threw the snack item in the trash and we began our trip. Problem solved, right? Not so fast…

We attended Isaac’s game (they won!) and immediately afterward returned to the car. We opened the car door and again, the nauseating smell returned, stronger than ever. I looked around hoping no one was too close because they would have wondered about the occupants and quite possibly called the police. I asked Isaac if he was the person who left the offending applesauce cup in the car and he confessed. We went to the grocery store and I scolded him for his carelessness. All of us were suffering because of his mistake. How inconsiderate, I fumed as I scooted among the aisles. 

My husband and Ike took the groceries out of the car when we got home and the moment I got into the kitchen, for the third time in less than two hours, that despicable, wretched smell had somehow followed us into our home. Ike was going to get it good, I thought to myself. 

Even though it was dinner time, I told my DH that I wasn’t sure I could even stand to be in the kitchen. I am known for having a very sensitive nose but even Mark could realize our house stunk. So with unmatchable strength and courage, we began smelling the grocery bags. I even told my husband, “praise the Lord, I’m not pregnant, because I’d be losing it all over the place!” We counted our blessings indeed.

First we blamed the baby watermelon but when we moved the baby watermelon to the dining room, it smelled perfectly fine. Then we blamed the pork butt we had just purchased. Surely the name of that cut of meat made it suspicious but alas, when segregated, it was in no way repulsive. What was going on? What smelled? Who smelled? What were we going to do?  Ew!!!


Mark got to the last grocery bag and nearly lost his lunch. His head jerked
back, his nose turned, he grimaced and nearly dry heaved. At last, he had found the culprit! “Ugh!” he exclaimed. “It’s the chicken you bought!”

“I didn’t buy any chicken today,” I replied…

Then a moment of vomitous reality waft over me. I had bought chicken TWO days ago…

The seemingly innocent package of chicken breasts had been baking in my husband’s trunk for two days! How did it smell, you ask? Are you sure you really want to go there? (Here comes the gross part) Ok, well imagine spoiled milk, broccoli, French cheese, baby diapers and death all rolled up into a package of chicken and you have a mild idea of what we were dealing with. Please forgive my careless reference to French cheese. (Having lived in France and having eaten quite possibly hundreds of pounds of French cheese, I feel like I can say this with a measure of expertise and without criticism to Camembert and all my French friends who enjoy it.)


With record speed, Mark ran those rotting chicken breasts to the outside trash. Our house smells returned to normal, hallelujah!

I was looking for someone to blame and it turns out that it was an honest and innocent mistake. The applesauce was innocent. So was my son. And the watermelon. And the pork butt was cleared of all charges despite its dubious name. 

Morals of the story: 

1. Be careful to look for someone to blame, maybe there isn’t anyone to accuse. 
2. Be slow to judge and quick to offer mercy. (We ended up laughing about this after the problem was solved.) 
3. And finally, and please folks, write this one down and learn from my family. 

Meat left in a hot trunk for two days smells absolutely disgusting. Sometimes those are tough and stinky lessons to learn on a hot summer day. 

Isaac and the Tender Tones

3 Comments

We are soon leaving for a family reunion to Pigeon Forge, Tennessee. My mother’s large extended family and the resulting very prolific brood will be gathering at cabins, hoping to avoid black bears and having wonderful fellowship together. Saturday afternoon, according to the official itinerary, we are having a talent show. After a short while of brainstorming, believe it or not, our gang has found a little bit of talent, go figure!

This weekend our family will be showcasing the following talents:

Aaron playing either the mandolin or the guitar.
Me demonstrating how to make a burp cloth – (the crowd will surely go wild!)
And then the musical sensation, Isaac and the Tender Tones which is quite possibly going to be the highlight of the entire time we are together. 

We are looking forward to the fun! I know it won’t be American Idol but it will be giggles galore and that my friends, is something we all could use!

Aaron will not be performing this talent but it is unique…