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Five Minute Friday – Dive

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Lord, please forgive me for watching 30 minutes of this incredibly stupid show!

Lord, please forgive me for watching 30 minutes of this incredibly stupid show!

After our company left on Wednesday, I turned on the tv. Bad idea. If the Five Minute Friday were any other word, I wouldn’t even be sharing but yes,

I watched about 30 minutes of Celebrity Diving and I repent. Perhaps the stupidest show ever created.

Strangely though, that ridiculous show, which I wouldn’t have watched had the tv not been on that particular channel, it did get me thinking about diving.

That feeling of plunging into the unknown is exhilarating.

The whole reason we had company on Wednesday night is because two people jumped into something.

In some way, you could say these guys are divers!

In some way, you could say these guys are divers!

Last year, my ministry-minded olive shoot began tutoring Hispanic students at a local church every Monday evening. He became fast friends with one of the boys and soon Aaron was working with this young man every week. As I contemplate the word “dive,” I see how my OS jumped into this opportunity with all his might.

During break from college, Aaron returned to visit the students and soon reunited with Mario. His mother embraced my boy and an offer to make us dinner materialized.

Diving into opportunity and deliciousness, two moms of three olive shoots bond over food, faith and family.

Diving into opportunity and deliciousness, two moms of three olive shoots bond over food, faith and family.

Two days later, Miriam was at my house. Homemade, from scratch tostadas, homemade mashed beans, Habanero sauce, queso fresco – mouth-watering delicious, authentic Mexican food carefully prepared for us to enjoy.  This precious mom of three olive shoots dove right in to my kitchen. Without any hesitation, she prepared us a meal and insisted on serving us even though we would have been happy to make our own plates.

We dove into our meal, the experience, the love and common bonds we shared. I want to dive into that moment again.

So what’s Five Minute Friday? What’s 5 minute Friday? It’s where a beautiful crowd spends five minutes all writing on the same topic and then sharing ‘em over here. Check it out, I love it! 5minutefriday

“Thank you, Cindy”

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I took this picture just before going to meet with Charlotte. I had no idea what to expect.

I took this picture just before going to meet with Charlotte. I had no idea what to expect.

I began my career as a stay-at-home mom when my youngest olive shoot was 18 months old. I had experienced a spiritual conversion to Christianity in December 1997 and instantly felt the Lord beckon me to be more present with my husband and family.

What I didn’t know is that just before leaving the corporate world, apparently I had made a profound impact on a person’s life. Honestly I only have a vague recollection of the small effort I exerted. A competent professional was deserving of the referral I offered. For me it was no big deal, a no-brainer. But for Charlotte, it was life-changing. Don’t we all want to positively influence others and make a difference?

Today, I’m privileged to have Charlotte as a guest blogger. I’m sharing her words with you today to encourage YOU.

Charlotte carefully wrapped a beautiful gift for me. She even carefully picked the ribbon.

Charlotte carefully wrapped a beautiful gift for me. She even carefully picked the ribbon.

Now, here’s Charlotte…

In 1997, Cindy recommended me to one of her corporate clients. Fifteen years later, I am still providing consulting services for that company. My sincere thanks to Cindy for the referral and for her confidence in me and my business. I met with her a few weeks ago to celebrate the 15 years and to give her a special gift. As I reflected on the great gift she gave me in 1997, I thought of these “Three R’s”:

Receive – Through Cindy’s generosity, I was given an opportunity to receive. It was clear that I could never repay her for what she did for me. Yet I could pray for her, for peace and prosperity in her life. In addition to the gift of the referral, it is a gift to be able to receive without any strings attached.

Remember – I am intentional about remembering those who have blessed my life and my business. Cindy’s name remains on that list. Though I could never repay Cindy for her generosity, I do take time to remember her and to express my appreciation. This year when we met, I gave her a gift of art and it was a total surprise. We shared updates with each other and through our laughter and tears, we remembered, reflected, and relaxed.

I just sat there stunned at the kindness. I had no idea.

I just sat there stunned at the kindness. I had no idea.

Repeat – Another way to express my appreciation for the referral from Cindy is to make sure I support others by making referrals, connecting people, and cheering them on as they pursue their dreams. Each time I do so at the company I mentioned, Cindy’s one act of generosity in 1997 continues to be shared with others.

This is Charlotte!

This is Charlotte!

Thank you, Cindy. You have made a big difference in my life, my family, and my business. May God continue to bless you and your family today and always.

With a grateful heart,
Charlotte

Whether you are a professional career person, a retiree, a college student or a stay at home mom with a side business selling soap nuts and stuff (um, that would be me!), employ the three “R’s” more often. Your efforts, however seemingly insignificant they may seem at the time, can bless others in ways you never imagined. Expressing gratitude can help move someone from the miry pit to a place of hope. Charlotte did that for me and I guess I did the same for her. Blessings replete with potential and healing await, truly!

What “R” are you going to do today?

Charlotte Purvis is a communication coach and highly rated professional speaker. Since 1985, she has partnered with individuals and organizations seeking to take their communication skills, customer service, and presentation styles to the next level. She’s also a lovely and generous person I call friend. To contact Charlotte, here’s a link  and her email  charlotte@purviscommunications.com. 

Five Minute Friday – Opportunity

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My handsome Scrabble buddy

My handsome Scrabble buddy

My children are older and the opportunity to enjoy them for long stretches of time is shrinking. I’d love to say that when we are together, it’s always joy and laughter but that would be a lie. Sometimes we fuss and squander the time we have.

But not yesterday. I went out for coffee with my ministry-minded OS Aaron. Armed with a travel Scrabble board, we entered into a spirited game of words. Two pretty girls were nearby and while I had a good advantage over my opponent, I also eavesdropped on a nearby conversation. Upon learning that these girls loved Jesus, I leaned over to them and I guess you could say I seized the opportunity.

Obviously there was not a lot of opportunity in this sampling of letters!

Obviously there was not a lot of opportunity in this sampling of letters, however, I stayed the course and managed to land a victory!

“Um, excuse me, girls but I was just wondering if either one of you would be interested in marrying my son? I noticed that you love Jesus and so does he. What do you think?”

Sometimes you have to take advantage of the moments God gives you. Big deal, it didn’t work out, you can’t fault a mom for trying. Aaron left the coffee shop single and soundly defeated by his mom. Was it worth it? Heck yes!

"My mom took advantage of every opportunity to make this a very memorable game of Scrabble!"

“My mom took advantage of every opportunity to make this a very memorable game of Scrabble!”

Carpe diem.

What’s 5 minute Friday? It’s where a beautiful crowd spends five minutes all writing on the same topic and then sharing ‘em over here. It’s like free writing therapy for the tongue-tied, tired, or blocked blogger. Learn more here!

Excited to be doing FMFs again!

Excited to be doing FMFs again!

A Soldier ornament give away in honor of my Soldier

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"I enjoy jumping out of planes!"

“I enjoy jumping out of planes!”

Today my Soldier received a snazzy new pin for his uniform.

Nate got his jumper wings and has graduated from Airborne School!

When Nate was four, my oldest OS fell out of a second story window. His little body slammed to the concrete first hitting a clay pot. He suffered a fractured skull and I felt overwhelming guilt that I wasn’t watching him when he decided to play with the cat by our bedroom window. Praise Jesus he survived this random accident!

Now this same child intentionally jumped 1500 feet out of a perfectly good airplane. He didn’t suffer any broken bones during his five jumps though the same cannot be said for a few of his Airborne classmate. One has badly broken ankle and another a broken leg. Nate went from four foot practice jumps to the real deal.

This is my ornament positioned right by a picture of the Hubs and I on our honeymoon in Spain.

This is my ornament positioned right by a picture of the Hubs and I on our honeymoon in Spain.

So in honor of my son’s achievement and the fact that he’s my best Scrabble buddy, I’m offering a give-away. Thanks to a generous donation by Letters by Lilly, I have a super awesome Christmas ornament that’s perfect for a military family.

Nate often underestimates the courage it takes to do many things. As I listen in awe to his adventures, he speaks humbly about his achievements which far exceed the external and temporal. Each of my olive shoots inspires me in a different way, I honor my Soldier and all those serving in the military, thankful for their selfless service.

I placed my Soldier ornament on this tree. Nate will be with his bonita in El Salvador for Christmas, this will be another reminder of him!

I placed my Soldier ornament on this tree. Nate will be with his bonita in El Salvador for Christmas, this will be another reminder of him!

If you would like to win this ornament, leave a message on this post. I’m going to randomly select a name from the messages on Sunday, 6PM (EST). I will post the winner on my blog. Great thanks to Letters by Lilly! I love you, Nathan!

Counting my blessings

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Aaron post-surgery, no kale but I'm not complaining!

Aaron post-surgery, no kale but I’m not complaining!

A week ago, Aaron had stomach pains and bam, within 24 hours, he was recovering in the hospital from appendix surgery. Although we have been silly and jovial about his speedy recovery, please do not take this as a lack of appre- ciation. I’m a 14 hours’ drive away from my boy. He’s never had surgery and I wasn’t there when that changed. Not known for my calm and demure nature, I was shockingly peaceful although he was in Chicago and I in North Carolina. The Lord used many people to stand in the gap. I have to acknowledge the sweet details God did not overlook.

1. Wisdom – It’s still surprising that my middle OS thought it was worth going to the hospital for abdominal pains. Aaron consulted with his RA, the Hubs and a few buddies and went to the hospital in the middle of the night. With this quick thinking, perhaps Aaron was spared a burst appendix.

Maybe Uncle Rich needs to be hospitalized! ;)

Maybe Uncle Rich needs to be hospitalized! 😉

2. Family – near and far my family rallied around Aaron. My sister, aunt and uncle came to visit him in the hospital. When my family said they would be happy to help if Aaron ever needed anything, they meant it. My cousin’s family reached out to my boy too. This allowed me as a mama to feel connected despite being so far away.  You wouldn’t have known Aaron had surgery a few hours previously, upon their visit, my aunt felt a party-like atmosphere in his room. A sense of celebration filled the air!

3. Humor – Since he was a toddler, I’ve always considered Aaron to be my human tv. He entertains me immensely. This time, however, my ministry-minded OS needed distraction. According to my boy, there were times in the Emergency Room where shrieks of laughter emanated from his room. Most people who go to the ER aren’t particularly jocular, Aaron’s friends made appendicitis kinda sorta fun.

I loved seeing this smiling face4. Testimony – The doctors asked perfunctory questions about Aaron’s personal life. “How much alcohol do you drink on an average week?” they inquired. Aaron’s reply, “I don’t.” They persisted because Aaron’s buddy chuckled at the question. “No seriously, how much do you drink?” the doctor wondered. My middle OS then replied, “I go to Bible college.” The doctor quickly retorted, “That doesn’t have anything to do with the question.” Aaron’s answer was steady and honest. He doesn’t drink. We are NOT perfect people but I delight in times when my family’s testimony is consistent and true.

5. Scripture – Aaron’s friends wrote Scripture verses on the nurses’ orders on the white board. They prayed for and over him and claimed God’s Word as truth. I pray the staff felt the Lord’s presence in his room.

6. Sacrifice – One of Aaron’s friend had just returned from her precious grandma’s funeral. She went right away to the hospital. Another suffered a horrible family tragedy and still wanted to come see Aaron. Incredible and selfless. They were not only concerned about Aaron but about me! I was deeply touched by everyone’s thoughtfulness. His friends were willing to do anything. ANYTHING. Two stayed overnight and helped him in very personal ways. I was in almost constant communication with them and I never had to initiate any conversation.

7. Face time – with my boy, his friends, his doctor, the surgeon. If your college student has an appendectomy, make sure you have an iPhone.

Prune juice and me looking like a chunky monkey

8. Kale and prunes – After surgery, I informed the doctor that Aaron needed kale. They don’t have kale on stand-by at Northwestern Memorial Hospital but I appreciated that the doctors were pro-kale. We also learned that Aaron actually likes prune juice. He appreciated the flavor in addition to its “medicinal” qualities. Huh…

9. Sweetness – I was leaving my own doctor appointment when Aaron’s physician called me to tell me the surgery was successful. “Will you see him in the recovery room?” I inquired. “Yes, I will.” “As soon as you see him, can you tell Aaron that I love him very much?”  There was a smile in the doctor’s voice as he answered, “I’ll be happy to do that.” The surgeon not only cared for Aaron physically but emotionally. A lady in the lobby overheard my conversation and asked me how my boy was doing. Kindness abounded near and far. Aaron recalled the surgeon giving him my message. Love.

10. School – Imagine entire classrooms of college students praying for your child. Imagine a professor beginning a lecture offering up prayers for your kid. That was our experience at Moody Bible Institute. Appendectomies stink but having legions of caring people nearby is cheerful medicine.

As far as I’m concerned, I already have my Christmas gifts. They came to me in the unexpected and most blessed ways.

Going through the valley

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Sometimes there’s more going on in a picture then you might realize. These precious people have offered me support in ways I never could have imagined. I love them beyond words. The Hubs isn’t in the picture but I love that man with all my heart.

Sometimes when I look at other people’s facebooks and blogs, I think to myself, “those people sure are having a great time. They all look so happy. It doesn’t look like they have any problems.” Huh.

I can further surmise that those people always have a clean house, plenty of extra money, no significant struggles. Can you relate? Have you ever done the same thing?

Recently an acquaintance of mine posted a picture of her family. Had she not mentioned that her daughter had nearly barricaded herself in her bedroom just moments prior, I would have had no idea. Everyone had  fashioned lovely smiles, they looked perfect. Behind the scenes though, it had been a different story.

I was at another gathering and a godly woman I greatly admire shared how she had completely lost her temper with her children. She had become so frustrated, she shattered a plate on the ground. I would have never expected.

I don’t enjoy knowing people are struggling but sometimes it can help me feel better about my circumstances.

To say that I have been in great emotional struggle for the last several months would be a major understatement. If not for the LORD, the Hubs and my olive shoots, it might not be an exaggeration to say that my blog might not be the only thing that didn’t exist.

Foggy places

Foggy places

The only way I can write this is because God has been moving mountains. The dense patches of fog I experienced when going to and from Chicago in October were emblematic for what it’s been like for me personally. With great reluctance, I have been examining painful parts of my past I really wanted to ignore. It wasn’t like I just woke up one day and decided it was time to tackle this junk. Trust me. It’s been a messy process.

I have literally been clinging to Jesus uncertain of the path He was taking me on. Had I been given the option, I would have gladly retreated and not seen my way out of the mire. The valley has been deep and treacherous.

The LORD has been my strength and my shield. He is seeing me through the darkness. When I was a little girl, I wanted to be an archaeologist. It intrigued me to imagine unearthing hidden artifacts. In order to get to the treasure though, archeologists dig and sift. They bend over the dusty ground and tediously rummage through the worthless in the hopes of discovery. I never pursued that career option but I’ve been doing spiritual and emotional archeology. At times when I was unable to see what was before me and tremendous, horrible anxiety gripped every part of my being, the LORD granted me courage to move through it all. My husband and my olive shoots offered me unconditional love when it would have been easier to not walk alongside me. With the help of a Biblical counselor, my pastor and others, there has been restoration and promise.

Today at church during our prayer time, I publicly thanked the LORD for what My Holy One has been doing. We attend a very small church, we don’t handle snakes or do anything weird. It is a real and honest place full of sincere, imperfect people. I feel safe there in every way. I couldn’t stop the tears even though it was slightly embarrassing. Crying and praying out loud require concentration! I know personally what Psalm 31:8 means. The LORD did not give me into the hands of the enemy but set my feet in a spacious place.

I pray that this post encourages someone who might be going through the same thing. I send you my love and support.

Know your soap and enjoy a soapy sale!

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Let’s have a SOAPY sale in celebration of olive shoots!

If you are looking for a thoughtful gift for a loved one or a way FOR YOU to de-stress during the holidays, may I suggest something as simple as a bar of high quality soap?

Before my brain discovered why natural soaps are better, my skin told me. “We like this soap!” it squealed after first encountering lovely cold processed, handmade soaps. “I feel fresh and squeaky clean, not like I’ve been through a car wash!” my face declared one evening. 

There is a difference between natural soaps and commercially made soap. For a limited time, Olive Shoot Institute is offering a soapy sale. When I began to use soap nuts last winter and started a business in the fall, I discovered  100% extra virgin olive oil based soap bars. Since I’m the mama of three olive shoots, of course, the word “OLIVE” got my attention but to keep me interested, there had to be more. Here are some things to know about cold processed, handmade soaps –

Not many people make soap like this any more – it’s old school!

Caribbean Craze soap

Ingredients are unique – your nose will pick up notes of unusual ingredients – spearmint essential oil (Handsome Man), Pure African Shea Butter (Caribbean Craze and Charcoal Hippie), Cinnamon Leaf (Bay and Cinnamon Shaving Bar) just to name a few. The specks of color in each bar are visually appealing but offer their own health benefits. There’s a sense of care and nurturing I get in using and giving them to others. Honestly it was joyful giving my Soldier and my ministry-minded OS several bars of soap to take back with them to Fort Benning and Chicago.

Rich in antioxidants and natural nutrients

Glycerin – this gentle natural humectant is removed during industrial soap manufacturing which might explain why my skin always felt like it had been treated so harshly. Um, it was!

No petro-chemical derived ingredients, animal fats, synthetic fillers and/or synthetic dyes and fragrances.

True story, when I pick up my shipment of soaps, I rip open the box and take out a bar of  individually wrapped soap to inhale on the ride home. Weird, maybe. My latest fave is Charcoal Hippie. Activated bamboo charcoal helps deep clean pores without leaving a residue but is loaded with ultra-moisturizing botanical oils and shea butter of the highest quality. Too bad my blog doesn’t offer smell-a-vision.

Ike closed his eyes and he picked Handsome Man soap as his favorite every single time!

My orange hair, freckle face OS loves Handsome Man soap. He says, “it smells good. It smells fresh” Upon further pestering, Ike replied, “I don’t know, Mom, I just thought it smelled good.” There’s a succinct review for ya!

You don’t have to be a hipster to totally love Charcoal Hippie soap. Made with activated bamboo charcoal, pure African shea butter and essential oils of eucalyptus, lavender and patchouli!

Why torture your skin and expose yourself to unnecessary chemicals and toxins when there is a better alternative? Truly, cold-processed soaps are superior to what you are probably using. Treat yourself and others to the difference!

We also offer other natural products to clean your laundry and home! Check it out at Olive Shoot Institute!

Here’s another great resource that’s worth checking out – Environmental Working Group!

Five Minute Friday – stay

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Sometimes Kleenex, or in this case, a paper napkin, and words go together beautifully. Poignantly.

Our hands were still clasping around the circle. The ladies in my writers’ group had just finished praying. So many words, a few tears, precious, tender moments shared by women who love the Word and words. We don’t even hang out aside from our monthly meetings. I don’t know anyone’s birthday unless it’s on facebook. If I had a Christmas card list, they’d probably all be on it but we don’t speak very often or ever but once a month. Yet I love them so.

We are missing one of our beloved writer moms, Kristi, but we had Flat Stanleyette join us!

And when we enter into that holy, sacred place for about 90 minutes, our hearts are entwined and are pens are prolific, it is majesty. I learn that I’m not the only one who feels inadequate, discouraged, beaten down, anointed, driven and terribly imperfect, compelled to write and express.

“Wait. Stay. We have to get this moment.”

So after the “Amen” in our group, I felt the Lord speak to me. Hang on, ladies. Stay. I grabbed my camera and asked the ladies for one more brief moment in their midst. I didn’t want it to end. I had to capture our time together. Click.

Even got the Hubs to take pictures.
Words join us together and we acknowledge the Giver of words.
Nothing…autism, anxiety, illness, finances,
family woes, Alzheimer’s, aging parents, childhood memories,
these things do not separate us, they unite us.
Those extra moments of staying together carry me through today.

Seriously, you should do this. You have five minutes of voice and words. http://lisajobaker.com

Every Friday at 12:01am a few hundred (or is it closer to thousand?) women pop on over to Lisa-Jo’s page to find out what the word of the next 5 minutes will be.

No over thinking.
No editing.
No extreme planning and linking and photographing.
Just FIVE minutes of writing to see what comes out.

Here are a few of my writer’s friends’ blogs, check them out!

Still Delighted
Joy Goggles

A Matter of Grace
Sharing Life

Five Minute Friday – quiet

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Glamming it up at the lake – NOT

You won’t see me wearing “buds” in my ears when I’m walking or pretending to run around the lake. I have been assaulted in two countries – mugged in Peru and spit upon by a total stranger in France, I like to see and hear things before they approach me. Gotta be watchful after those kind of experiences, trust me.

Instead I enjoy hearing the ducks quack, the white swan bellow and the squirrels skitter. Dogs patter by and of course the people scuffle or rush past me. That’s all the earthly sounds I need.

I enjoy all those sounds but the thing I enjoy most, ironically, is the quiet. I spend a lot of time talking to God on these walks/jogs. Yesterday I logged over six miles around the lake and all the while, the Lord and I discussed life and my struggles. If I had music blasting in my ears, I’m certain I wouldn’t hear his voice. Instead the peaceful surroundings afford me a chance to reflect. To be still even though I’m walking/running if that makes any sense.

These are the sights and sounds I enjoy as I walk around the lake

Contemplative times around the lake

In the quiet, the Holy Spirit gets my attention. He bestows insight and courage. To move forward, to grieve, to heal, to contemplate, I need the quiet. I’ve asked the Lord why He has me going to a lake to exercise. It’s cold outside, not especially picturesque with the trees becoming barren.

And I believe He is telling me He wants to spend time with me alone. Just Father and daughter time.

For the losers, 5 lessons learned in junior high about running for political office

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Don’t let this picture fool you, I was a serious candidate, btw.

I know something about running for political office. I ran for Treasurer back in junior high. This is my advice for all the losers in today’s elections. It’s the least I can do for democracy.

Please feel free to pass this blog post along to the losers of today’s elections. I sure do hope it helps them move forward.

1. Be gracious – When I was running for Treasurer back at Jefferson Junior High in the 1970s, I learned to hold my head high as I walked past those who did not vote for me. And I did so in bell bottom jeans no less. Yes, I wanted to burst into tears upon the news of my failure. Sure, in addition, I was dealing with hormonal issues, what 12-13 year old girl isn’t? Yes, I had body issues, poor posture and pimples but did I seek vengeance on my opponents? NO! It probably crossed my mind but I chose higher ground. Dear losers, be nice even when you lose.

2. Work on your public speaking – I found speaking into the intercom during school announcements absolutely terrifying. Maybe that’s one of the reasons I lost. Not sure. My fellow classmates probably detected the quiver in my voice when I spoke into the microphone. So what did I do about it? Did that stop me from ever speaking again? NO, my friends. After college, I had a career teaching executives public speaking across the country and in three countries. Later, I spoke to over 50,000 kids about super private stuff like waiting to have sex. If you work on your presentation skills, you can channel that skill set into other endeavors. If I can do it, so can you.

3. Stand for something – With nearly three decades to ponder the reason for my unsuccessful bid as junior high treasurer, I think my platform might have been weak. I should have outlined clearer goals and strategies.

4. Campaign ads don’t always work – Trust me. I spent HOURS working on stenciling my campaign slogan on poster board. I bought neon poster paper plus I used brand new, smelly magic markers. WIN with WINTER was my catchy phrase, how perfect but guess what? I lost, people! You can pour yourself into your campaign, develop the slickest designs out there and still not rock the vote. It’s going to be ok.

5. Pursue other dreams. Try other things. If you would have told me as junior high Cindy and that in just two short years, I would make history, I wouldn’t have believed you. But sitting in front of me as I type, I hold the title for being Gala West’s MOST IMPROVED BOWLER – 1974-1975. The trophy sits proudly in my office next to my computer. I’m looking at it right now. Dear losers, may my story inspire you. My dreams were not dashed only diverted.

The coveted Most Improved Bowler trophy, yeah, I got insurance on this.

My Soldier, myself and my trophy. Btw, You can order your own doll at http://stores.oliveshootinstitute.com/-strse-26/Guinea-Pig-Girl-Doll/Detail.bok

Interesting side note – two of my three olive shoots have also run for student body political offices. I’m the mother of two former class senators (Nate and Aaron) and the mother of the student body President (Aaron). Furthermore, as the mama of a West Point grad (Nate), a comparative politics major no less, my public service aspirations or that of my olive shoots will not be revealed but here’s a hint. We will not rule out a future run for office. Stay tuned and be encouraged all you winners and losers out there!

Do you have any suggestions for the losers based on your junior or high school government days? I’d love to hear them! Check out http://stores.oliveshootinstitute.com/-strse-26/Guinea-Pig-Girl-Doll/Detail.bok if you’d like a super cool homemade gift for the holidays!